Confused For 4 Years

I moved house when I was 10, and made a ton of new friends. These happened to be Adam and Ben Speight. My cousin, Becky, went out with Adam, and I went out with Ben. I never guessed what would happen next.

Becky broke up with Adam, and Ben dumped me. Adam and I were both quite low. He got a new girlfriend, but was dumped a few days later. This was when I started having feelings for him, and when I admitted it, he played with it.

First it was things like, “You’re my best mate” and then “If you were my age, I’d go out with you.” To an 11 year old coming from a 13 year old, this was amazing. Gradually, my feelings deepened. We had a few ‘relationships’ but every time we went out, he just ignored me, not replying to my texts, always out when I called for him, not answering the phone.

Last August, he got in touch and he asked me out. We kissed that day, and I felt fantastic. The following day, we met up and kissed again. He was working later that night, so he went in to have a sleep.

That was the last time I heard from him.

Now I’ve seen him a handful of times, and each time he hasn’t said a word to me. He just stares at me, really hard, until I go out of view. I love this boy so much. Just to be friends with him, speak to him for a few minutes, would be heaven. I would do anything for him, but my friends and parents just tell me to move on, but it isn’t that simple. People act like I’ve got a choice in feeling this way. How can I change this?

DreamWorld DreamWorld
18-21, F
May 22, 2007