Truth In Booze?

Sometimes you need to be drunk to reveal a truth and sometimes you don't. Last night I got a call from a friend, I missed it so I returned his call later on, he didn't answer. He did eventually call me back, but he was drunk, very drunk. Since he was close to passing out, and I didnt have much to talk about besides one thing, I suggested he called me the next day. Just when I was fixing to go, he said "I love you". I had to stop him and ask again to make sure thats what he really said- he begin to backtrack until I called him out on it some more until he finally admitted that he did love and care about me. My head swam, because as long as we knew one another, as lovers and as friends on and off he has never told me that. I mean, I always had a feeling he did but this is the first time he said it to me. I just told him he was bullshitting me because he already had a girlfriend he doesnt hesitate saying he loved, and I had to point that out to him. He has "many girlfriends" me, his real girlfriend and one where he lived which made me wonder was that an admission or not, but probably just him being intoxicated. Anyway, hes like "I do love you but not like I want to spend the rest of my life with you kind of way". I had been having some rough times with threatening to kill myself lately and I told him about it. It manifested drunkenly as in "I love you and I don't want you to pass away" instead of the "I love you" I wanted to hear. I guess I should feel ok by his concern, but he only upped the confusion by asking "when will we see eachother again?" I just gave him an uncertain answer, because do I want to? He's made it clear when he's drunk and when he's sober that he doesn't love me in that way, but when we do meet up every once in a blue moon, hes all over me like a cheap **** and I fall for it every time. Not sure if this classifies as an unrequited love story or just another confused relationship story, but I'm beginning to just get over all his bullshit.
Lov3intheasylum Lov3intheasylum
36-40, F
Jan 13, 2013