You Know They Don't Love You Back When...

Symptoms of Lovesickness

One Broken Heart

Too Many Unwiped Tears

That E  m  p  t  y Feeling

Pain. Lots and lots and lots and lots of pain. So deep it cuts into your very being. Leaving scars that will last long after the pain.

When more time is spent on the person you love than you would ever spend on yourself. Even if they would never give you the same sacrifice, and couldn't care less what your time is spent on.

No matter what you will always believe there is hope. And you despise yourself for it.

When your Heart has been ripped out, and ignored, yet still can't let go.

When you would do anything for your love... Even if it means that you can't love them.

When you try to find new ways to hate them. Becuase then at least it wouldn't hurt so much.

When everything is out of your control.

When you can't say why you love them, and to you that's the strongest love anyone can ever have.

When you realize that you can never, ever have them...again...

When you have finally hit the lowest low. And no one can bring you up, and anyone who can will never be there.

When you care so much about the person you forget about everything else completely, even your health and wellbeing.

When you sit and write something like this crying to yourself, and wondering why you are so pathetic.

When you can't sleep at night becuase when you close your eyes, they are standing there to remind you that you are alone.

When you feel all these feelings, but are too afraid to tell them, becuase you're scared they might not care. And the truth is they probably won't.

When you feel their presence everywhere. But you don't want to because it's just another reminder of how far away they really are.

When the pain is so great, you feel that giving up altogether is th only choice, when really you have so much to live for.

When they have told you that they don't love you. And you would do anything to say those same words...and mean it.

But the only words that you can say are:

I love you, and no matter what happens I will still love you and I still think of you all the time. I know it means nothing to you, but you mean everything to me.

Please if anyone ever falls in love with you and feels this strongly. Don't shrug it off like it is nothing, I'm not asking you to love them back, I'm just asking you to care.

And if anyone ever falls in love with someone this strongly and they don't love you the same way, hold on to every last bit of sanity you have. Don't let it completely ruin who you are. You are a wonderful person and can pull through. You will have some very rough times. But, it will get better...

I hope. At least that's what I've been told.

wycomper wycomper
26-30, M
609 Responses Dec 31, 2006

I'm going through almost the same thin who is the guy but I got married to and that I love so much and he wanted me to get a divorce and then get remarried in a church but in my heart I feel that he don't love me and it hurts me really badly and it hurts me to see my kids hurt but a lot of us have to stick together and I hope that good people like us will find peace and find the healing that we need and I'll hearts then we have to keep our heads up no matter what

I know that feeling to well

I sincerely thank you for posting this. It says everything I feel. And even though I would NEVER wish this on ANYONE, the fact that someone else understands exactly how it feels does help. Because it makes me despise my weakness and willingness to allow the same person to do this to me TWICE in my life a little less consuming. And it makes me think that maybe, just maybe, people like us are NOT the weak, pathetic ones in these situations. Real, selfless love is the most beautiful gift that can be given and received. And obviously, people like us have given that, even to people who are not capable of honoring that or experiencing either side of it. And so maybe that makes US strong and brave and beautiful human beings. And maybe it makes them weak, or even pathetic. Or maybe it just means that we should feel pity for them. That they will never understand or experience the most beautiful gift there is. And we will AGAIN. Because maybe it was never about the people we gave that love to, maybe it was our willingness to give that gift in spite of what it costs us. Maybe that says much, much more about the beauty inside US than the horrific rejection of us. And if we have that inside us, and we don't let bitterness destroy it, I honestly believe that we WILL feel that and give that again. Next time to someone who values real love and is capable of giving it back. I can't completely feel that right now in my situation, but I BELIEVE that one day I will. And I wish that for all of you as well. Thank you again, you'll never know how many hearts you've touched and given hope to with your writing.

that was beautiful. I almost cried.

Add a response...

I love this person, but never felt anything when we kissed....but when I was sitting next to him I got butterflies. It was like I could be next to him forever and be content. Strange and confusing is what it is.

Me too its love maybe

And what about if you already married this person? When you fall in love you leave yourself wide open. Nothing the person you love could ever be wrong in your eyes. You don't fall in love at first sight no matter how strong the attraction. Don't base your attraction to partners on physical attractiveness. Get information about the person -do your research well or you're setting yourself up for almost garenteed misery. Don't cheat on previous partners and turn around telling someone you'd never cheat on them. You are just another person carrying the compulsory gene and you need to make those around you aware that you ever have a problem or risk ruining your own life and the lives of those you come into contact with. You may think you know the difference between love and lust but you don't. None of us do. Love is not what you've been taught and you'll never truly know love unless youve had your sexual organs removed from birth. Sexual organs are your biggest enemy in terms of using cognitive reasoning to choose a partner. You are experiencing self pity to even be reading this and no one will provide the mercy you need. Find strength within yourself or your belief system. You are just as important as every other person and animal in the world. If you are here its probably time to suck it up and walk away.

I am 13 and I met this guy at camp. The first time I saw him something hit me. When I found out he liked me to I was the happiest girl. We were supposed to get with him one night but I got to scared... But, I still loved him. He made me feel like my heart had been spun around and around. Only a couple days later he got with another girl. A girl who didn't respect girl code and was a bully to me. After my heart felt like cupids arrow was ripped out And heavy chains were thrown on top weighing it down and drowning my love in the depths of a dark ocean. I was confused and hurt. Why would he loose interest in me in me that fast? Why would he switch me off like a light? Before he got kicked out he told me I looked like Madison beer wich is a huge complement. He kept on complimenting me. Then he got kicked out and back to California. I love him and I don't know if I will ever stop loving him.

all so true but, for anyone in this situation, go out loads make as many new friends as possible, meet new people as well as hanging with your old friends as well a lot, you cant stop the pain from happening but you can reduce the time it takes to go away, altho the scar will last for life, think of it as a battle scar as long as you are alive you haven't ever lost! someone will come and make everything alright maybe someone else to love or might just be a new bestfriend you make and just helps you feel content with who you are. Dont do what ive done in the past drink, drink, drink, until you realise how much money you are wasting and risk serious damage to your insides and you brain, you will eventually get to a point where the alcohol doesn't do anything and the pain will still be there and worse than before. you need to let yourself do the healing drinking majorly stalls this process, time defeats and outlasts everything so don't wry it will get better be as positive as possible x P.S remember your the one who is having or had your heart violated you should not be the one feeling bad love is weird, things happen the wrong way round a lot!

what I just read is how I feel everyday. It hurts so much the only difference is the person did love me back and for a long time we were happy but when he broke up with me it was like I never existed. Its like everything we shared together were all in my head, lies. And every since then I have had a hole in my heart that I thought would heal over time but boy was I wrong it is still there, he still haunts me every damn day and there is not a second that goes by that he is not on my mind. And all the while I want reasons to hate him bc somewhere in my mind I feel that if I hate him the pain of what he did will eventually fade but I cannot bring myself to hate him even after I everything I sacrificed and gave him like for instance my virginity, ugh so it was so long but if u read thank you

What would you do if your girlfriend ask you to always leave and ask this question what would you do if I said I love you but I don't love you as much as you love me ... I don't know how to feel it been running in my mind all day

I would end it. You deserve someone that will hold on and never let you go. You deserve to be someone's knight in shining armor. I am currently going through a bad break up. We dated for a year but he didn't see me. He put me down and I was never good enough but I love him. I know in my heart he didn't love me so even though I cry everyday, I made the right decision. Follow your heart.

I love him. I thought it's possible that he'll love me back. I was wrong. He loves someone else .. someone's who's not me and am hurt.

Every think is black and dull and boring and then Dean walks in and it's like stepping off a plane I'm Spain on the hottest and sunniest day of the year. I literally feel my heart crying I have felt real pain but no amount of broken bones or cuts and bruises will ever amount to the pain I feel when I'm without him. I can't bare to ever not see him again he is my entire world and I would rather pull my teeth out one by one then not see his face every week! He knows that I love him but I'm afraid to tell him everything in case it pushes him further away help me please somebody? I fear if things don't change soon then there won't be anything left of me to help :(

I am going thrgh the same...I love someone soo much n always express it..n ead he does is ignore it and neva show care..I cry..It affects me..but d person neva cares...I feel alone

I too loved someone...he has always been in front of me every second...truth is accepted that he will never love me back...but to me all that matters is that i love him...will love him forever no matter what..i will wait n if destined he will realise some day..but i cant allow anyone to be replaced..he has always been special...a few things are not in our hands..but loving them i would just say love them till the end...but live your life happily..cry when you feel like but the next min get up and live your others be kind it will always help you..and being in contact with the person you love doesnt always ruin u it depends on you, how you want it to be..accept them as your friends and keep the love within you all will be right with time...

I am going through this and it hurts! I cry my eyes out all the time and have rough sleepless nights. The person I love just lost all interest in me and I still love them dearly! I don't even feel the same anymore! I feel like an empty hole and just feel like I'm just soo low nobody can get me out....

I feel that way too, it hurts so much and it hasnt gotten much easier and i hate hearing ppl tell me that its gonna be okay when it hasnt gotten any better

I am going through this right now the fact that this will mostlikly be true it gives me just enough comfort to go through life with the friends I have.

All my friends have had a go at me for feeling this way I can't express how much it means to me that the author understands me on every level xx

Ive been through this with a person that i dated for five years...i did everything for him and he never made me first choice....i did anything he wanted me to do.....i completely humiliated myself asking for him to take me back in front of his building....word of advice, if a person makes you feel like what the author. Described above, you must lose complete contact with the person.You will never, ever get better until you close all contact.... and you will never ever win their heart.....leave before you turn into an evil person filled with envy, depression, and will evebtually want to see the other person hurt just so they could feel what you feel....but you have to let go....but trust me when i say, that the person will feel the exact pain you are feeling if they did you wrong....

I feel the same way you do but I've been told and seen many girls are waiting for .y boyfriend of 3 years -karmas not swift enough in my opinion xx

don't go overboard mobbing for yourself it only makes it worse.

This is the same for me. I pretend he is with me, and I am sharing my good experiences with him. But these imaginings aren't real, and I wish I could stay in my imagination forever.

i m facing same problem...
bt it is not problem..i love her...
today 1 more day when she was sleeping without saying me gud nyt..
actualy she said that she love me a lot bt her act says she is lying...
i dnt know what to do..plzzz any1
..i love her so i cant hurt my heart anymoree..i m not able to restraint myself,she is everything to me..i dnt y..y m crying....i feel likeee sm1 press my neck..wat to do...she is sleeping..

If you could lose all contact with her , do sorry to be so blunt but you wont win her heart. Even if she trues to contact you, dont contact her back....change your number....and maybe two or three years from now youll be fine.....

Its not easy to hurt yourself..bcs dat damn it person wont understd..dey take it as if u r blackmailing..n d person dont see that u love them soo much that u can do nythg for them.

Does saying I love you no matter what happens bad ? (Girlfriend said it)

Im currently having a girlfriend for almost 1 and a half year.. today she told me she starts feeling less about me. Everytime I say I love you, she responds with: Its really hard for me to say that... I love you too but.. less..
It ******* breaks my heart. I love her with whole my life, I'd given her my whole life..she is my life. I'm typing this while crying in bed.. I feel depressed and empty.. i don't know what to do.. If I keep this relationship.. I'd have to wait for her to give her final decision.. wait in pain.. And maybe she'll dump me.. which means the waiting was for nothing.. or I break up with her... but... i love her too much to do that... I don't know.. help...

if she love you the sameway u do ,she will care for u but if not she is the big loser...she will lose one good lover,don't worry there will be some one out meant for u...

it is close to valentine's day. so give her a gift and a nice letter of stating why you love her and then give her space. truth is you both are young and feelings change. let me ask u this. do u think many married their girlfriend of age 16-17 years old??? probably not. and it's things that come up like this. give it your best shot and if she doesnt appreciate you. then it's time to let her go. I wouldn't be surprised if she likes someone else though. just saying

Just break it off....she doesnt love you.....

Wish I cud have such lover or atleast a friend....... I m too alone:(

1 More Response

I hope so I'm driving myself insane I relized I loved someone after we broke up I will never get a second chance he doesn't want me back and I love him I lost him and I hurt everyday I think about him every second of the day I just want to have a second chance I will never have one I can't get over him I wish I can I hope one day I'll meet someone who will love me the way he did

hie eveyrone. so this guy came in my life when i already was seeing someone. he changed my outlook n way of living. i saw myself in him. though me n my broke up long bck. but this guy use to take me fr long drives.....dates...movies. yeo we goto same college. he dosnt even look at me in college. strange init?/ but yep, during movies we hav kissed too. i couldnt restrain myself. my frnd told me to stop seeing this guy. wen i told him about my feelings he went angry sayin this is my obsession. but it seems he is seeing someone already. his frnds mock me in corridor teasing by his name, n all he does is giv it a pass. idk! i love this guy, there is this whole big connection i feel....sonetimes when he looks at me. i got blank! i feel like not giving up hopes. but then again i am not what hes lookin for. i am just passing fantasy. its been 2 years now. its killin me. i wish he knew what he meant to me.

He does know what he means to you and the harsh truth is he doesnt care.....some people feed their ego off of that love.......speaking from experience...

You hit it right on the head. If someone knows you care about them a lot and remains lukewarm and keeps you at arms length, but never really lets you go or draws a line, they're feeding off your feelings like an emotional vampire. Run.

Just incase anyone still reads this feed I want to tell my story to all you young high school girls on here,
I was 12 when I meet the boy who would be my first love he asked me out and I said yes a week later I broke up with him at the dance I hurt his feelings so much he went home and actually cried a little I never knew this until later the next school year came around I was 13 and so was he I realized that maybe I did like him after some flirting he asked me again this time I said yes and meant it, I had never felt the way I did before he was all I thought about every day at school we hung out until finally we started hanging out at each other's house's he was my first everything, we were "in love" we stayed together for 6 years we had our ups and downs but he'd always show that he did love me when I started to think he didn't, and we always thought we'd get married we came from a small town every knew us and how long we had been together and it was no suprise to anyone when he got foot ball captain and I got homecoming queen are senior year, but by the end of our senior year he began to change although we were both going to the same college right by our home town he had gotten a football scholarship although I knew he was still trying to make it work when we'd fight he wouldn't act like it didn't matter if I gave up and walked away he just started to not care but I wasn't ready to give up and neither was he but you'll learn when your in you're 20's and look back at who you were from 13-18 you realize how much different and how much you have changed and unfortunately that is why your first love most typically won't be your only love, because you don't really know who you are yet and what you want and neither does that person...the boy I had fallin in love with turned out to be a man that I could never be with by the time we both turned 20 he had become a drinker "something he never touched in high school" and began partying and lying behind my back my heart was crushed 6 years of my life wasted something I could never get back thousands of memories I could never erase, and as much as he tried to deny it I knew he had cheated on me, so after 6 long years I broke up with him it was the hardest thing I ever had to do I felt numb inside for so long I didn't think I could ever fall in love again I quit school and started partying I got depressed I did anything I could to numb the pain but everyday I got a little stronger I couldn't speak about the break up for months, I blocked him from Facebook I could barley speak his name with out getting upset, but it all seems like a distant memory now I kept fighting I never let him know how badly he broke my heart my soul and my sanity I stayed strong and acted like I was living it up. It'll be 2 years this April since the day I ended it, and I did fall in love again 6 months ago he's asleep by me right now. And it doesn't bother me a bit to talk about my ex I unblocked him from Facebook and occasionally hell txt me sometimes I reply with a I'm fine thank you for asking but hey I'm busy can't really talk or sometimes I just won't reply at all because I genuinely don't care anymore I don't feel anything for him and it's an amazing feeling to know I pulled myself through that. So for all you people out there with broken hearts. Just remember if I can get through it so can you 6 years is a long time and breaking up after something like that sounds like an impossible feat to get through but I assure you it's very possible and things really do get better.

hate to it but you got karma is what it is..:P

I remember seeing my first love from across the P.E. field. She was wearing a yellow skirt, black boots and shirt. I was in the 8th grade and I liked her without even knowing her name. in the 9th grade I had her for history class. the last period of the day. I asked her to be my gf on feb 5th 1991 and she accepted. we broke up 5 months later. or should i say she broke up with me and also broke my heart. we went to different high schools. I then saw her 2 years later and I had that same feeling for her. we exchanged numbers and she said she always regretted breaking up with me. we became close and got together feb 12th 1994 and even attended prom. her mother died 2003 and that was really hard on us. we got married june 12th 2004. my mother died 2007 and that broke me. I became distant and my wife must have felt alone just like i did. one day in late august 2011 she asked me to move out for a week. that she needed space but that we would work it out. I did. that night I received an email saying she was divorcing me and that there was nothing I could do. and she meant it. She moved in a coworker and they now sleep in what once was our room. I live with my brother still rebuilding my shattered heart. I've tried dating but i cant shake my ex image. her laughter, her voice, her love. somedays i feel proud of how im dealing with this ugly truth of divorce. and somedays I feel lonely. I forgot how it is to be loved, hugged, and kissed. I forgot how it is to have someone next to me. and I hope to one day forget the pain. I hope also to one day find that woman that has a sparkle in her eye that will shine with my silly jokes, my drawings, my poems, and my love for her. but ....... the time is not now yet. my heart is still under construction . :(

I loved a guy too. He was at first so responsive, he would send me long messages back and we would always talk and always have everything to talk about. In person he was quiet, but cute and shy and we would explore things, places, try foods together. Then one day he said were out of the honeymoon faze. He changed his profile picture from us to him and he changed into someone cold who barely ever said I love you, who would not kiss me, would not hold my hand, told me I was too energetic to stand by in public, would not wrap the one gift he bought me for my birthday, did not want to go anywhere, said I was not worth the drive. He said he had a dream of a girl he used to like and woke up with feelings for her. He was awful, I kept hoping the him I met would come back and he never did.

I hope you feel better by now ,love is evil...

Hi, I'm a white witch and I'm here to offer help got those in need. Wether it's healing, love,money, life stresses Id like to offer a solution.

As a white witch I do not cast spells that will force unwanted feelings upon yourself or other.

I simply get you back on track whatever the trouble may be.

As a alot of witches charge I choose not to buy if I do help I would insist a payment to a charity.

Of your choice. That would be a sort of thank you and payment. I do not take any money from you for anything I do I simply ask you to donate to those in need too.

But if you do need guidance I'm here to do that.

Sairah x

Hey Sarah I really need help I really would like for my gf to come bk in my life her name is Raina Samuels can u help plz

Help I'm going through this right now and it's tearing me apart what do I do ? I was thinking of breaking off our friendship because this hurts too much

Break off the friendship

It is really interesting how it is worded. I totally agree with it.

I kinda gave up on love though. The only one I had hurt a lot. Spending all the time and effort on her and then her ttearing it up and putting it back in my face. It hurts. At least though, I've gained my positive outlook on life back, before I had this girl. I was depreseed, and normally; I'm never depressed, only for funerals and stuff like that.

Anyways, I do appreciate that there is somewhere in this world that we live in, that one could go to receive the love they need. This would be one of those places.

...I'm in love with him and he isn't. An FWB relationship. I flipped when I realized he signed up for another on-line dating website. This crushed me as I thought he took his profile 6 months ago that's why I've decided to take mine down too. Unknowingly he did and lied. But what can I do, I fell into this trap and now he knows how I feel about him. All I can do is to help myself by moving on and keeping myself busy. I'm still afraid for those days to come when I will miss him so badly and would want to text him. I would have to just try to keep myself intact and be strong not to text him back. I know in no time i will be ready to love again. They say even if we want to find love we can't really force things, and that just keep yourself busy and you wouldn't realize love had find you. That's what I plan to do

I'm going through this right now... I fell in love with a guy in my class. It was just a crush at first but it became love. I think of him when I wake up, on the bus, in class, at night... I cannot control. For two weeks now he knew and he was making me jealous because it pleased his ego. My friend told him that he couldn't do that and that he was making me suffer but today he came to see me and said "I know you want go out with me (he then asked me I said yes). I just wanted to say it is not reciprocal. I didn't mean to make you suffer and I'm sorry if I did. Ok?" The thing is he said it with a "funny" voice like he was trying to avoid it. He wasn't able to say it seriously, in his tone of voice I could feel he didn't care and he was just telling me this because my friend told him to. I knew what he did, to make me jealous, what he was saying behind my back ("make her wait","I'll drive her crazy","she loves me") because he told it to my friend but he didn't have the guts to tell it to me. My friend told me everything so I know he was supposed to tell it to me but he just brushed it off by just saying that he doesn't like me back. Why do you tell someone that they are perfect, pretty, everything to look in a girlfriend, gorgeous eyes, etc. as a confidence and you mean it, but you just don't really care ? It's ******* painful, and not only the fact that he doesn't love me back but the fact that I feel like I'm not even a person for him. I'm starting to regret this day because I should have showed him how painful and horrible it was and how bad I wanted to cry my eyes out all day when I just laughed with him like nothing happened. I want him to know that he made me suffer. But know is holiday time so I won't see him for two weeks. I wish I had school for just one more week... I do not want to start dreaming about a message from him because it will not happen.

at this very crying beside him.and he doesnt even realized it.

That was written by me by the way

I know this is going to sound crazy but I am only thirteen and going through this, I would literally do anything for him to just be happy even if that means not existing I love this boy to death but he doesn't see me.

I give you my all
Every ounce of my heart
If you will promise me
Never will we be apart

A promise I will give
This one very true
If you do not love me
I will still love you

My heart can not be detered
For it is strong and loud
I will hide no longer
I love you though I'm not proud

A fear I will speak of
Only for you
I will love you forever
My heart a constant coo

You have broken me times over
A heart cannot be remade
But you can heal it yes
A very difficult trade

Just know my love is strong
Forever in my soul
The worst part is though
Only you can make me whole

You are an old soul and a poet. If he doesn't love you, then he isn't the right one to know you and appreciate you. I'm old enough to be your mother, but I went through something similar last year. It still hurts, because I invested so much of my trust and caring... I made him a lot more "beautiful" than he was...but now I realize how limited his capacity to love was and that I value myself too much to live on crumbs. Check out a website called Baggage Reclaim... it'll help.

Everything i just read is true and im living it right now. I couldn't feel more like dying than i ever have in my life. I haven't slept in weeks, i feel like i barely have the strength to walk. Oh Please tell me what to do for i don't know. My heart is broken in every way that it can be.

I'm dealing with a part in life so similar to this...I'm a 14 year old girl in her Freshman year of High School and I have this friend who is 16 years old who is in his Junior year. He one day asked me out, me being the gullible girl I am said yes and right away fell into his arms, while he gave me my first kiss. Two days went by and after that, he broke up with me; I later began to realize that he didn't have equal feelings for me, ever. He still had feelings for some other girl who's a Sophomore; this girl "hates" him. He used to stalk her, but I didn't use it against him, for I care too much about him and am not willing to lose him yet...We remained as friends, but I still have feelings for him and he knows it! We give each other signals, he recognizes mine, but I can't seem to figure his. He told me that I was his true friend as he could trust no one other than me. Someone dear to me warned me to give my love(the love I'm willing to offer) to someone who deserves it, he looks in my eyes as the "someone" who deserves it; every other person he knows at school judges him, while I'm the one who truly accepted no matter how awkward he seemed around our peers. I don't want to abandon him, he needs me as a friend beside each other. He may not have equal feelings, but I know deep down he considers them, while we both have equal hope in my opinion

Can some help me i love someone but they dont how my gonna makinghim to love me

I am going through all of this right now. I want him to be happy, even if it is not with me and I still love him, despite knowing he does not love me. I wish I could forget him and move on, but I don't want anybody else....I just wish it will get easier.

Its not that easy because if your live is true love is impossible to forget

My name is Trisha from Singapore. I have to give this miraculous testimony, which is so unbelievable until now. I had a problem with my Ex husband a year ago, which lead to our break up. when he broke up with me, I was not my self again, i felt so empty inside me, my love and financial situation became worst, until a close friend of mine told me about a spell caster who helped her in the same problem too his name is Dr Stanley. I email Dr Stanley the spell caster and i told him my problem and i did what he asked of me, to cut the long story short. Before i knew what was happening my husband gave me a call and told me that he was coming back to me in just 3days and was so happy to have him back to me. We have two kids together and we are happy with ourselves. Thanks to Dr Stanley for saving my relationship and for also saving others own too. continue your good work, If you are interested to contact him and testify this blessings like me, the great spell caster email address is (drstanleyspelltemple@hotmail. com) you are the best among all the spell caster online.

I know how it feels. You need to get over it and start looking at other people who will love you.

Cheep your head up I was in a relationship like that and now that he is gone I feel so much better.

When more time is spent on the person you love, than more you would SPEND on YOURSELF..... = loss of SELF WORTH... encapsulated in the whole being of another, that you have " FORGOTTEN YOURSELF...YOUR SELF". I have been there, & not proud. To really love should not lose him/her self..... but yet we are all guilty. NO PERSON OR BEING IS WORTH ANY VALUE IF WE DO NOT VALUE OURSELVES. From a Christian standpoint.....we must value what God has created.... from a spiritual sense... the same implies, that as an individual being, there is significant value. Loving another person is really one's way of "SHARING THEIR ENTIRE SELF".... rather than "GIVING THEIR ENTIRE SELF". :)

Everything you have written is exactly what my girlfriend feels with me...and I dont know what to do... Because I feel like I have convinced myself that I love her, but this is not true...and I get these feelings of emptiness, and times where I just cant tell her how much I love her....because I doubt myself. I have had this twice now, and im afraid that im playing her.....but at the same time ive never felt so much love from one person, and in ways i care about her so much...but its never enough. all her time is spent on me, she loves me , like true love.

What should i do? i want to be with her, but maybe its for all the wrong reasons, and for this i should let her go?

I am also scared of hurting her anymore because every past relationship for her has been so terrible, and when she met me, i swear she has never been so in love, i mean she loves me more than anything and i am sure for her its true...for her im the one


I care about her so much, and i do have feelings for her, but i just know its not love... and i feel like i'm living a lie,

I don't want to leave her or tell her this, because it will break her heart, and i don't know how i will be able to live with myself afterwards.

wow. Every word of that carries so much depth and hurt. But it's not worth even trying to attempt to love a person until you realize that true love is not passion or human committment. Understand that God is the source of love. God IS love (1 John 4:16). Enough to save the world through his son, the saviour of the world, Jesus Christ. (John 3:16) I promise you it's the best love out there. It doesn't end at death. Nor does it ever stop because of error. When you understand the love that God has for you and are moved by that love, you can begin to love others. Without this love we are nothing. This is a love that FILLS a void, and give purpose to life. If you understand this agape love, then you won't be hurt by human love because your heart will be in God's hands. God Bless you. Reach out to me if you need anything! Have a blessed day!

i really appreciate your response, i am in that kinda situation right now, if you are still here, i need those kind of words now to pull me through and probably out of this. hope to hear from you

Not every person is Christian. Religion should be separated from comments or advice, as not to impose on the beliefs :)

why does it bother you that someone mentioned their faith in Christ?? u can talk about whatever dead god you want to believe in around me and you wont impose on my belief in Jesus Christ...If you aren't a Christian then the comments from the Christians dont apply to you so keep strolling instead of being political...Faith is what help one get through scenarios like this...

I promise you, we are both Christians. I met him and my heart betrayed me... it just went and fell in love with this man. He knows which makes me feel worse. I have NEVER been in love before, my love for our Father is different. His can your heart just up and love without your consent????

1 More Response

So here is the thing I'm so much in love with this girl I am willing to give up on everything she gives me butterflies when I'm away from her for hours when I get off work all I want to do is come home to her. She says she loves me on some days and she don't on others what do I do???????? I can't get over the thought of being without her I need help

Jesus F. Christ. Thank you, from all these years later. I'm feeling every effing word of that right now.... I wish my Dream Girl would see this. "Don't shrug it off like it's nothing. I'm not asking you to love them back, I'm just asking you to care." Yesterday I was reduced to literally begging her not to leave me alone, I would accept the pitiful remains of a friendship that was once closer and more caring than any I've ever had in my life... She threatened to delete me once and for all... And me still pleading my case she simply went silent... Then when I checked later she was offline for the first time in months... I guess it was no threat. I feel so alone and used up... It's making me feel physically ill. Only a couple of months ago I was writing her several times a day, sharing everything I am... My thoughts and feelings and only a short time before that, neither of us tolerated being apart longer than a few hours. I trusted her in every way, and before I realised what was going on, she was pushing me away, cutting me off... Ever so gradually. I was tortured by it but did not dare say so because she suddenly became extremely intolerant of any negativity. Now, today she is gone. And she didn't really even say goodbye.

same happened to me, but if you look at it this way, if she is still your friend, you will still have feelings for her, your feelings would grow and grow even further, and if she eventually ended up with someone else, that would have completely crushed you.

True. However it was destined to happen either way.

very long and boring

As I am writing this, I've decided to come out of my depression. I never thought one day I would admit that I am depressed. I was such a happy-go-lucky girl but that one guy left me in such a mess. It's been almost a year and a half now. I still cannot sleep more than 2-3 hours. First thing on my mind in the morning: What excuse shall i come up with so that I can call him. I cry everytime i think about him, about how he does not love me anymore. He shattered my self esteem. I can't look at myself in the mirror now without thinking how ugly I am( his words). He is moving on with his life, he goes out with his friends etc . I always fear that someday he will meet someone else or that someday he might just hook up with some random girl and I my heart races at that tought and I feel like I'm suffocating also. I so want to go back the way I was before...

He did not shatter your self esteem.... you did, by giving yourself away. Give yourself the gift of returning yourself back to you... you are SO DESERVING !!! :)

Well, about a week later after I wrote this, I went to his place for the week end. We were invited to his uncle's birthday party. He made me cook for the whole party. The party was on saturday. He waited until sunday night to tell me he reconnected with a girl on facebook and that he would be going out with her. I cried, he smashed my stuff. About a week after, he called me for his stuff he left at mine, insulted me some more. Said he would rather pay a prostitute than get back with together with me. For a whole week from the moment he told me he was gonna date that other chick, I cried night and day, didnt eat. I even tried to slit my wrist and hang myself. But when he said he would rather sleep with a ***** than have me back in his life, that was it. I woke up the next day, blocked him on my phone, blocked him on skype and facebook. I thought to myself that I couldnt love someone more than I love myself. I started thinking positively again. Promised myself I wouldnt wallow in self pity but instead rise again. I got a new job the same week I decided to take control of my life again. And everyday I try to find something nice to say about myself. And believe me it's working. I'm not there yet but I am building back my self esteem and learning to love myself again. I will never love someone to the point that I forget my existence. I can't say that I am truly over him but one thing I know is that I will not let him back into my life. I am in a much better place now. I am learning to love myself again and value myself again. There are ups and downs but it does eventually get better one day...

This is my story... except there was no name calling... what happened to the me before him? I can't find her... neither do I want too. She seems weak to me now. I really am having a hard time getting my heart back.

Bravo Wycomper!
A lot of emotion there! Lot's of heart!
You nailed the feelings that everyone feels with words from your experience!
This same experience has given me artist's block in my life.
Thank-you for shedding light on the feelings I could not explain...
Artist Block in the studio. by Doug Rohloff

Inspiring, thank you! It's definitely hard to get over someone, but this made me feel better.

I wrote this story at one of the hardest points in my life. I am now so incredibly overwhelmed by the love and support and sharing by everyone in this group. It has been 6 and a half years since I posted this and I can say from personal experience that

It does truly get better.

I found that the there were things that I could do to help with the suffering and the pain.

Here are my Remedies for a Broken Heart.

Get it out there.

Get it all out.

Scream and cry and moan and yell. Let yourselves grieve. Bottling up these emotions inside is incredibly detrimental to one's psyche and health. You need to own these feelings and treat them as important. Because, in most cases the other person will not. Sometimes it feels wonderful just to tell someone (sometimes it's the one you have feelings for and sometimes it's your favorite teddy bear). It can feel as if a weight is lifted off your chest. That's partly how I felt when I wrote this story and I'm now feeling things above and beyond that with the fantastic response to this post over the years.

Do you feel that E m p t y feeling? Fill it.

Find something that you can involve yourself with and that helps create goals in your life. Paint a picture, write a poem, sing a song, pick up a sport or hobby, join a club! Having something to look forward to that you can do by yourself or with people who love you is so important to the healing process. Especially if you are meeting new people in the process. This can help you focus on other things, and you might even meet someone who really appreciates you.

One of the hardest things about loving someone who doesn't love you back is the feelings of inadequacy. Why am I not good enough?...

Writing those words brings me straight back to those times. This is the part of the story that still burns to this day. The scars are still there after all this time.

All I can say is: we're all human.

I've loved those who will never understand that love and I've been loved by those whose feelings I cannot return no matter how much I want to.

It is not fair but it is human. And I thank God every day that I'm alive to feel all of these strange and wonderful emotions. To cry, to laugh, to love, to lose. This is what it means to live.

I am the product of my experiences and I wouldn't change me for the world.

THis was good.....Food for my mind...

I understand this 100% as I am going through the stages at the moment, but she didn't care and shrugged off the relationship and my love like it was nothing more than a piece of dirt and it hurts more than any physical pain I have been through. I know I will never fully get over this pain and the love I have for her, I tried hating her for throwing away my love and feelings so easily but I can't.

Been there t hurts greatly Even worse if they LIE and stay they love you back but it's just emotionally manipulate you. Now my vast love that I had is turned to HATE and wish the person who hurt me so much over the years to fall off a cliff. Think i never loved them I did thats probably why I hate that person so strongly now. Go though hell and come out alive and you'll know how I feel.

how many comments are there??!! lol amazing story! x

im in love and reading this is almost relating alot! sometimes i think that death would be more better than dealing with a broken heart! i know what love is and it hurts so bad...fml

We just want you to care.....even though we know you don't and will never want to again.....and yet our love remains inevitable.....

I would add to this list when you work with someone and every day you see them you fall in love all over again and then when you go home in the evening you get a little better and start to get over it... and then you go to work the next day and see them and you fall in love all over again (repeat to infinity)

And every day it kills you a little bit more

Your comment has given me hope... I can't imagine your suffering. Fear is torment according to the bible. Your situation is screaming torment.

This is an old post but it is so true!!!

This is an awful feeling i hate it :/ wish we could have control over the people we fall for

:) thanks for expressing these feelings..

Thank you for putting my feelings into words.


I wish I could bookmark this

I know how that feels..

That was an amazing piece of prose. I'm totally floored by it. Thank you for sharing this. It really touched me.

Did you get better now?

Someone who really loves you will love you UNCONDITIONALLY

When I know I have to stop going back to him every time he changes his mind, because even though it feels so good to be wanted, I know he'll never love me back or care about me the way I care about him. When I realize I have to do what's right for me for once, even if it rips me apart...

so im not the only one who feels like this..good to know im not completely alone

Im baffled, I can't even really figure out what to say. I have a heart condition and I almost feel faint because my heart just kept rapidly accelerating the more I read. I've read other peoples comments on how amazing of a writer they think you are and they're telling the truth. I hope you know how moving this piece of writing is, I mean I had to lay down so that's gotta say something. But in all seriousness, reading this has brought out some feelings that I guess ive never wanted to confront, but now I can't help it. Thank you so very much for sharing this, I'm really so happy to have stumbled upon this, and don't ever stop writing! I'm also very sorry that you have to endure this pain too, I know it's devastating, but you seem to have a beautiful outlook on your situation and I know that if you just keep that positive aspect about you that you'll be damn near invincible one day ;]

"When you try to find new ways to hate them. Becuase then at least it wouldn't hurt so much."

I wish I could just hate him or not care and then it wouldn't hurt me when he would rather sit on a dumb computer game than spend time with me. Oh he says he loves me but his actions speak louder than his words. If only he would say instead that he hated me and it was over and then I could accept it and give up trying and move on with my life. But every time I think I've reached the point where I am over it and I won't allow myself to love him with no love in return he tells me that he loves me and begs me to stay and my defences crumble and I fall right back down to where I was before thinking "it will be different this time" and then it isn't and I scold myself for being so foolish. I'm too smart to act so stupid. But it is that little shred of hope that keeps me hanging :( Why do people hurt the ones they love?

I was too smart to act so dumb... my sentiments exactly.

Sometimes its best to pretend not to care, even if you do because if u show you care in a way you're just joggling that person's feelings and making them feel like they have a chance. They need to move on and know that it ain't gonna happen, they need to go and grow.

wow!!! Thanks for sharing this!!

Wow. That's me right now.

43 years old and feeling like I did when I was 20 years younger. I have gone from the highest highs to seeking professional help and am on medication and getting counselling for my mood.

And all I need is her back in my life! Which will never happen.

The email never comes, phone never rings, texts never appear.

I never get the message. Every song on the radio says something about the relationship.

I got it bad still........................

Father God please help this person to heal naturally and spiritually... I ask in Jesus' name.

youre taking the right steps. amazing writing, keep pushing.

This Boy Should be a Writer. I am in Love with Someone I can never have. She is my Breast Surgeon. I had a lumpectomy and while I was half in the Bag with Anesthesia, I reached out and put my Hand on Her Face. And, She let me do this. But, then She bolted from the room. I was Mortified!!! We have flirted alot. But She was just having fun and playing games, while I was taking it seriously and starting to delude myself into thinking once I left there She would miss me, and have to call and see me...right?? She doesn't even return my calls now. This is absolutely the worst pain ever. It feels like I will NEVER get over this!! I can't eat. I can't sleep. My Heart Aches so bad, I feel like I might need open Heart Surgery. And, my stomache is tied up in knots so much that they'll never come out. I have an upcoming Mastectomy and Axillary Dissection. I should be thinking of my surgery, but instead, I'm thinking about her. Last time she looked around the curtain and when she saw I had not been knocked out yet, she ran back behind the curtain. So, I now face Major Surgery, amidst all of this emotional turmoil. THIS REALLY STINKS!!!

It takes the pain to know what's good though.


I cried when I read this

Very well put. Thanks for helping find the words for me. It is never easy when a relationship ends; it always seems that the "other" person can move on too quickly for us, causing even more heartache. How much could we have meant to one another if I have just started grieving and she has already moved on?

I feel this pain. Thank You. And, I hope you feel better!!

I had that same experience but by the grace of god he keeps me to love others.

You are so right and it is a wonderful job on what you wrote. I think this is true for alot off broken hearts.

Aahahahaha, so true. I was so naive back then :)) but the lesson's learned !

5 years and one engagement later I left because of his addiction. I have struggled every day for the last 4 months to move on to better, happier times, but everyday I realize I will never ever have him again; and most days that's a good thing, but right now it hurts. I just found out he had a date a few days ago through a reservation confirmation- this sucks. I have been grieving our relationship and couldn't even think about dating, and he is. So much for being the love of his life that he couldn't possibly live without. It is a hard lesson to learn- that you can be replaced by the person you planned a life with, that you were more invested than they were, that they could hurt you more deeply than anyone or anything ever has and ever will and after all that, no apologies or ammends-not one. After it all, he is looking for someone else to love.

*** my life. this happens to me all the time. years after years of neverending pain

This is amazing. It's absolutely right on the money. I know I feel like this everyday

thank you for writing such a wonderful experience.