Before I Knew What Love Was I Loved Him

it was 8th grade 2nd semester of career connections or something of the sort...one day i looked across the room at a guy who wasn't in that class before and for some reason i thought "wow we could be friends" and weeks later i guess he overheard me talking to my best friend[[who i am not friends with anymore sadly]] and i had called her a dude and out of no where he says to me "did you just call her a dude!?"and i looked up and realized it was him finnally i said yea and we had some little chat about the fact of her being a girl and i calling her a "dude" and later i went back to continue my conversation with my best friend and then the days after when ever he saw on my way to class me he'd yell out "hey dude!" to me and i'd look and see it was him talking to me and i'd think o! and yell back "hey dude!" and then one day he ended up sitting by me in class i don't remember  how and day by day we started to talk more and argue about things just because we liked to not argue as in a fight and he started flirting with me and guess i flirted back and then people would [[the whole class]] would embarrass us saying we should go out or that we like eachother and we're flirting niether of us admitted to it even though we both new it...he always flirted with me every chance he got and i'd flirt back sometimes...he was sort of my best friend to me even though i liked him. well anyways over the summer i thought about him and couldn't quit.. realizing the reason i didn't admit to liking him was because i loved him...i mean anybody else i could easily admit to likeing them and not like them as much as i liked him...next year freshman year of highschool we didn't have a class together but he still managed to misteriously show up by my side on the way to class whatever one i was going to and he'd flirt barely looking at me as his face turned red and one day sometime later in the month of september afterschool at his locker i asked if he was going to the fair and he said no i asked why and he told me it was boring and i responded with that's why you ride rhides and i was going to ask him to go to the fair with me [as friends][not a date] before the conversation and then i realised he was walking away from me as i was waiting for the moment to ask him i found myself trying to catch up with him because the more i caught up the more he got away and i asked him why he was running and he replied with the stupid answer i'm not i told him whatever and the next day i was ignoring him or just not looking for him to talk to him not to be rude but to see if he'd come talk to me well we didn't talk since that day and sometimes i'd catch myself sharing an unexpected glance with him other times i'd be talking to friends the friends who happen to be his friends and then from nowhere he'd walk past me and around me to interupt us and talk to them trying so hard to pretend i had no existence whatsoever and it hurt so badly one day [before that] when i was at another friends locker who i also knew since 8th grade who happen to become a best friend of his he walked past me and just interupt us and talk to him as i was about to walk away i decided to make an effort to talk to him i said to him you don't talk to me anymore an he waited for a second or two then finnally he looked at me and luaghed shyly but said nothing so i went to class...

i don't really understand why he started to act that way because at times i'd catch his glances and even once when i was passing him in the hallway with another guy..i smiled at the guy and kept smiling 'til he passed just testing wether or not it bothered him and from the corner of my eye i saw him watch me as he passed..i didn't use the other guy though he didn't even care that he was with me he asks anyone and everyone out...anyways i realised i love him but he never loved me...we didn't go out...and sadly i'll never know what happend between us.

it surely hurt to see him at school and to hear his name in almost every class i had just because so many people know him

one day i tried to get over him and it worked for a while and then it all came back to me one day...i guess i didn't truely get over it at first because i feared i'd have nothing left...finally one day i did get over him because i realised the fact that he didn't care and that we wouldn't be friends. i imagined how it would be one day if he did attempt talking to me but everytime i couldn't imagine that it'd actually happen or even that i'd be able to respond nicely all the while knowing he'd broken my heart somehow. the fact that he didn't care hurt like hell but it was the fact that helped me get over him.

 

and everytime i see/hear the question do you believe in love at first sight? i think of when i first saw him thinking we could be friends while never knowing in the end i'd love him...i don't truely know what i think about "love at first sight" but if i could ever use an example this would be pretty close i guess-- i think i do believe in love at first sight but i don't beleive you can just love a person at the pure sight of them but maybe after you get closer to them you begin to love them unexpectedly.

Loganberry Loganberry
18-21, F
5 Responses Aug 8, 2007

Hello, first, before I start commenting you story I must proclaim: Damn, I’ve seen double posts, but a quadropost!!! oooh<br />
But I must agree with SimplySarah... that's a wonderful story... too bad it didn't work out for you though...<br />
A similar thing happened to me with the same results... It's really painful to love someone that ignores you... I got over it after 10 month or so... I'm glad you got over it too :)

That's a beautiful story.

That's a beautiful story.

That's a beautiful story.

That's a beautiful story.