I Think I Missed Out On Love!

Soon after my final exams in high School, I met this guy that went  to my church. He was friends with my sister and he frequented my place, so that means I saw him often. We became friends and he could come over and we would talk for a long time. He was fun to be around and very intelligent. I liked his way of reasoning and the way he handled things. He was fun to be around and I enjoyed his company a lot.

He encouraged me a lot and I saw in him a great man. I don't know how it happened but just like that I started looking forward to his visit. Then he informed me that he was going away to university. I felt very sad but didn't let him know how I felt. when he left i found myself thinking about him a lot and since I couldn't share this with anyone, i decided to get a journal where I noted all my feelings for him.

I tried communicating several times, I even visited him once in college and he seemed thrilled to see me. With every encounter, he gave me lots of hope that something beautiful would develop between us and so I kept waiting and praying for that day that this would happen. With each passing day, my yearning for a relationship with this guy grew and so i convinced myself that I was really in love. He came to the town I was in several times and each time he would come to my place and since i thought something was growing between us, every comment he made, i interpreted as a gesture of love. He was protective and sensitive to my feelings and well being. As a result I convinced myself that this was the love of my life. I refused to entertain advances from other men because I told myself I already had a man.

I loved this man for years, and I hoped at some point he would love me back, but that never happened because he got engaged to someone else. It's somehow my fault cause I never really told him how I felt. I felt hurt but I told myself it was not the end of the world. I vowed to move on with my life and to concentrate on my career and people that cared for me.

I will be 29 on 16th August, and yet I've never been in a relationship. I still love him and wish him the very best in life, after all that's what love is all about. I just hope I can get back on track and get true love myself.

Loyce Loyce
2 Responses Aug 12, 2009

If you ever get the chance,maybe should tell him,maybe he was waiting on you.

Move on babe... Time waits no man. You are still young..and there is a man out there waiting for you somewhere... so all the best to you. I know when you love someone..you wait.. you hope...but at times you have to give yourself the chance to be love and pampered again.. ((Hugs))