I JUST Want To Thank You

I am so sorry because this is horribly painful. Please read my story about "attachment theory." You will find a link to a website, and also a book that I have read. I now know what to look for...the signs...right at the very start of a new relationship because of what I learned about this. You may find it helpful in recognizing the ones to avoid in the future. I see you wrote this is December 2011, so I hope you are feeling better, and have healed from this.

I've read with sadness so many times about this happening. I just don't understand why someone would be so twisted to as to manipulate another's feelings in any way let alone in terms of love. The people who do this must have something very wrong with them. I think of Miss Havisham and her training of Estella as an example of manipulative heart-breaking, though the role is reversed from male and female, in that, one of my favourite novels. Abuse resulting in abuse of others?

So sorry ... and very well written. Take care of you and dont give up. There are real men out there.

I experience the same thing. I agree with the last sentence.

As many here have mentioned, this sort of thing happens to both men and women. I am sorry, however, that you had to endure it. I hope this incident will not cause you to close off your heart - as so eloquently stated in the following quote.



“To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket- safe, dark, motionless, airless--it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable.” - C.S. Lewis

Damn you wrote the story of my life...well the story of my life earlier this year! I feel your pain and am glad that you're a smart cookie to know that no not all mean are lying, cheating, game playing bastards.

I am in the same situation and I can understand the pain very well.

Oh, sweetheart... your poem is so sad... hope you find someone to lift your spirits soon... just keep believing in yourself... learn from this experience and move on... be receptive to good things and they will come to you... peace, love and hugs to you :)

Never give up because there are some great ones out there. I am sorry you found a jerk first but he will make you appreciate the great one even more. I have been there and know that is the truth. **hugs**

Hey know you ladies can be pretty hard on us guys too! I have had my share of hurt

Im sorry.... whomever did that was sh;tty...

But Im a firm believer in karma.... They will get theirs.....



*hugs*

I'm sorry you got hurt. It happens to the best of us. Your words speak to the pain many of us have been through. It's ok to let yourself feel the pain, you need to grieve the loss of the relationship you thought existed. Just don't get lost in it.



Always remember, he was the one at fault here, not you. It's not a mistake to love someone else. There's no foolproof way to avoid the inherant risk in doing so. Locking your heart away is not a viable option. Trust me, I've tried. Take what you can learn from this relationship to make better choices for yourself. Leave the rest, along with him, in the garbage dump.

I could not agree more with the advise given by WomaninBliss.

Don't hurt yourself even more by assuming that all men will treat you this way. By shutting down you are just going to make it worse. A bit of time out, then get back out there again.

Not all men do that to women.

Very well written, I can feel your emotion....so sorry, no one deserves to be treated that way.