Unmotivated Under Achiever

i am a seasonal worker and have been for the last 3 years and i get more depressed with every ended season. i thought at one time i had a decent chance at a career after years and years of rearing my own children and everyone elses in my life who were hard at work with their own careers. the career turned into a job with no place to go but down. well to make a long story short i quit and decided to stop going down.My husband saw what i was going through and fortunately we could easily make it on his salary. I dont spend alot of money and we dont get in over our heads try to use cash or go without. My husband has since lost his good paying job the kids are taking their toll on our budget and i am beginning to feel extremely guilty about not contributing to the pot the kids are all out of high school now and one has a degree the other two are working on theirs. My husband is employed but he had to take a pay cut and there really is no reason why i should not be busy at work right now. Instead i sit here in my pjs at noon with no housework done and no groceries in the house typing to anyone who will listen. I guess i should mention im 50 and going through a midlife crisis i think. I was once in the military years ago and served my country proudly but other than that and graduating from high school and good people skills i feel like im so under qualified for any decent jobs out there. well hopefully ill get up the energy to get off my ever growing lazy butt and hop on the treadmill. My oldest daughter will be married next month we found her dress i managed to pull off a decent bridal shower and now im stressing over a mothers dress dont want to embarrass my daughter want to look good if i dont start now with the work outs and diet ill feel like and look like crap!!!!!!!! I have also been polluted with wine the last 2 week ends in a row so i vow not to do that again any time soon such a waste and seems to really add fuel to my already low self worth. well thats my story and im sticking to it. any suggestions for this lazy unmotivated mom

housebum housebum
46-50, F
2 Responses Oct 14, 2009

It could be depression but only you can really make that determination to ob<x>jectively look at your feelings and decide if you want help. I suffer from seasonal affective disorder (SAD) and anti-depressants can help, but sometimes it takes awhile to find the right meds and dosage- so you have to be patient (but taking ant-depressants for life doesn't appeal to me). I however have found supplement to help control my depression, I am a believer that our poor nutrient deprived diets and polutants are to blame for much of our ailments and the solution will not be found in a chemistry lab making up new drugs. I have been using DL Phenylalanine with great results and no side effects. I also take a liquid whole foods multivitamin and a sublingual B12 and folid acid (unless folic acid is in your multivitamin, you may not need to take extra), and I have been reading a lot about vitamin D3 and its connection to depression and SAD. Hope it helps and I hope you feel better!

Are you sure were not the same person here. My story is just the same except I work in the healthcare career as a EVS employee. I feel like I too can,t leave my job to find another one. All I do everynight is clean for dirty slobs that think they are better than anyone else , because they went to school to get a better job. My husband has a good job but I am the pcp subscriber. The answer to your question is seasonal disorder. I read about this online. It's when you get depressed when the weather changes. You need to talk to your doctor and he will recommend something for you to take and also find a hobby that you enjoy and do it. Let me know how this turns out for you, because life is too short to be depressed.