Utmost Hell

Hello Everyone
I have gone through an extremely tramatic time and I need some help.
I am 25 years old and my now husband and I married when my health required that I have an advocate during my life threatening pregnancy.
It was an extremely traumatic time for us both, I nearly died several times, he had to call ambulances every week, and eventually I had to terminate the pregnancy due that it was risking my life.
This was utmost HELL. and I do not know my husband managed to get through it, we are young 25 and this was something that most people don't even deal with.
On top of this--
My husband has an addiction to pain killers, and alcohol and recreational use of drugs.
This I feel has destroyed us--I had to leave home when he told me to leave because he wanted me to go to my family back in another state because he felt he couldn't help me since my family cut health insurance when they found out I married without their consent.
This is a nightmare, I am not there now and he isn't talking to any of his family--he goes out all night nearly every night and it's a nightmare.
What do I do? How do I get help? I am falling apart I do not want to end my marriage and I don't want to lose my one true love to an addiction--clearly this came out hard and clear as day from the stress we have been under--it as though the stress uprooted past issues that I was unaware of prior to this.
Please help me.
SkyH SkyH
Jul 20, 2010