We Have A Child

My husband and I have been married for 5 years and have a 14 month old child. Before we married he fully disclosed his long list of diagnosis:
Borderline personality disorder,
Multiple personalities.
Extreme narcissistic.
ocd
I didn't see anything out of the ordinary (outside of lying constantly about just about everything)until 1 year into our marriage. Now,
I cry every night. No empathy, no emotional. Connection. No conversations, no help around d the house or with our daughter, no intimacy. Out of the house the magority of the time. He isfully a workaholic. Found that passionif attractive initially aCaught him cheating when I was 5 months pregnant. Stayed because I was scared that if I left, my daughter would never
see her father. I wanted a family and I don't see how to keep us together. No trust. I am very verbal and in touch with my feelings. I express often and openly what I need from him and nothing changes. My daughter and I both deserve
better.
rahulswife rahulswife
31-35, F
2 Responses Dec 1, 2012

That's odd, most bpd's, even when confronted by a shrink they've been paying to see for months won't accept it as medical fact but blame the Dr. or anyone else suggesting something is horribly not right with the situation. About 80% are women with roughly the same pattern in identifying Narcissistic Personality Disorder in males which is more Dr. stuff but the patterns of behavior are similar, Emotionally Abusive and inherently self-serving.

With all due respect rahulswife, you're describing a jerk but based on my experience a bdp overestimates how clever they are and when "caught" WILL NEVER admit it. Then logic nor reality are limits as the "issue" becomes an opportunity to demonstrate a flaw in whomever dares challenge the fragile bpd ego....Anyways 18 years discovered 14 in what I was and had been dealing with, the patterns of behavior are written about and after 23 books, countless hours on the web, advise from 2 Dr's...Well, it didn't get any better but my son is 18 and as a teen it took me 2 years in Family Court to get him out of her house......But the point is, from what you've stated it may or may not be your issue yet you kinda chose him and to have a kid with him....Good luck and keep yourself emotionally healthy....

Hi rahulswife

I agree with JacobsGirl...leave if you can. My STBX left me while I should have left him after our honeymoon! I regret staying so long while he cheated, raged, and emotionally abused me. I stayed at first out of pride, and then we had kids and I stayed for the family. He left me...after he cheated on me again. He said I could never love him the way he needs to be loved. He is a very selfish man. He is a liar and a cheat. And there is NO changing that.

Please consider leaving. Why would you stay in such a horrible relationship? You and your daughter deserve better. It's true that he may leave you one day. You are better off being the one to set a boundary and then walk away with your dignity.

Sending you strength...