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Help, Please.

Hello, I was just hoping to share my story and get some advice about my situation.
I never thought I was a lesbian, until I broke up with my boyfriend in my junior year of high school. I'm not sure why I noticed that he was a little girly and reminded me of a girl. After the break up I went through a depression and thought I was a lesbian. For months whenever I thought I was a lesbian I would feel sick to my stomach. A couple times during high school I had these pangs when looking at my some of my girl friends. I'm not sure what kind of pangs they were and I was wondering if others have felt these kinds of pangs.

I am 22 now and I have a boyfriend for about a year now. I don't know why but I've started to feel really scared that I'm a lesbian. I've started looking back and my childhood and thought that some of the things I did in the past could have been signs that I am a lesbian. I look at some of my girl friends pictures on facebook and I'm not sure if it's strange to do so. Also whenever I see a woman I might think is attractive I get this pang of fear. It gets so bad sometimes that when I'm watching movies, I have make sure that I'm not checking out hte female lead. I still find some guys attractive, but I'm still scared. I'm not sure if I'm being paranoid or if I'm really a lesbian. I've talked with my boyfriend about it and he's been really understanding. I love him dearly, but sometimes I get this depressed feeling and that's when I normally start thinking I'm a lesbian. Help, please.
flowerchild2 flowerchild2 18-21, F 3 Responses Jul 27, 2011

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better way is keeping away from sex. people these days have multiple partners and its hard to know that they have std's till they are fully blown with that, so many are carriers of std's in disguise. i think you should mostly concentrate on a hobby which has a stronger impact than sexual stimulation of the mind.

If your so scared and the thought makes you feel sick then either your not or your too scared to admit to yourself, you will know in time what you want, everyone fancies someone of the same sex at some point in there lifes but that doesnt make you bi or lesbian or gay, dont worry or stress, just keep doing what your doing and it'll figure its self out, focus on your boyfriend and work ect then if you want a girl go get her and dont be afraid of what you are, even if thats just being a little confused :) best of luck, Ruby

Do not be scared or worried

You are perfectly normal

Most women have some degree of bi leanings

By the sounds of things, although you like guys and girls, you’re more attracted to guys than girls. And that’s perfectly OK too.

However, do not suppress part of your inherent nature – it only leads to unhappiness and depression.

Your boyfriend sounds really supportive and that’s great. Most guys carry a fantasy of seeing their girlfriend making out with another girl anyway.

Allowing yourself to feel your own feelings doesn’t mean that you’ll jump into bed with every girl that passes you by.

If you see a girl you feel is hot and you get aroused, go with the feeling – maybe even tell your boyfriend about it. I’m sure he won’t mind, especially if you take your horniness out on him.

Hugs

Sammi