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Here's What I Miss...

I miss dressing up and turning heads, I miss the attention I got as  single woman, I miss having marriage proposals being yelled at me in parking lots from total strangers, I miss touching someone for the first time, I miss the excitement of falling in love, I miss the thrill of the hunt, I miss going out dancing, I miss the sound of my own first name, now it's "Tell Mommy good morning, what is Mommy doing? Is Mommy being silly? My f*cking name is NOT Mommy!!!!! I miss feeling attractive, I miss sex. I used to vibrant, healthy, alive, confidant, independant, sexy, feminine...Now my husband (who now looks to me like a yellow-toothed troll) will turn his head away from me if I try to give him a peck on the lips. If this is marriage, shove it!!

ReddBrown ReddBrown 36-40, F 15 Responses Mar 1, 2008

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I would love to take care of you.

HI REDDBROWN...I SERIOUSLY THOUGHT I WAS THE ONLY ONE FEELING EXACTLY WHAT YOURE FEELING. I JUST RECENTLY MARRIED AND I HAVE A GREAT HUSBAND. BUT NOW MY ENTIRE LIFE IS ALL ABOUT WORK AND FAMILY, BEING A MOM AND WIFE. I REALLY MISS THE EXCITEMENT OF GOING OUT WITH SOMEONE FOR THE FIRST TIME, THE CHASE, AND FEELING SEXY. I HAVE NO CIRCLE OF FRIENDS ANYMORE. ...FEMALE OR MALE. I MISS THE SINGLE LIFE. IT SUCKS AND VERY DEPRESSING. THE WHOLE THING MAKES GETTING UP EVERY DAY HARDER AND HARDER.

Hello ReddBrown love this Thread about Missing turning Heads! I Miss So many things I guess, because Before your Married People Desire you and try to get your attention. And Now the Only Attention I get is from my 2 year Old! Constantly! My Older kids Only when they want Something! and my Husband will every once in a while will pass by and say " Why Do I have So many Kids " or some other sarcastic comment, Sometimes I understand why, I look behind me and find My kidz trying kill each other, My 2 year old is just as aggressive as the others. Crazy little Monkeys! ages 2, 4, & 5! and this is All Day long! I guess all my Husband Desires is staying away time! " Yes , but take me with you " I should Say! But, No Who would take care of my lil Devils of Destruction, They'd probably Hunt me Down Anywayz! ReddBrown, the word " Mommy " I know gets on Our Nerves Sometimes, I think that is because it Sounds more like an Echo instead of a Name, When you Hear it Soo many times Repeatedly, it then Stops making any Sense! But as for your Husband just Ignore him, thats what I Do, I pretend I'm with Some Latin Lover guy, with a Sexy Bud! and a tight behind! and I'll be like Hearing blah, blah ( paying No attention ) but who cares, and if he calls you mommy, tell him " call me Mommy Rica!" and Disconnect and make him Relax & Do the *** Nasty!, and for sure that he is not going to be calling you mommy any more!

I'm Sooooo Dyeing to get away, Maybe just for a day! What we forget is that we could Do both, We can have fun, & live Life and We can be Strong and Be Miss Mom! We woman can Do anything we set our mind to! Your kids will love you and Respect you more, & your Strength will pass to them and they will be more spiritually strong and very important INDEPENDENT & Free Willed ! and Hopefully they will Not commit the same Mistakes that we did! Like stop being who we are! Which is what I MISS the Most! Being me!

I'm sorry . I didn't clarify that very well! I LOVE to hear my children call me Mommy (ok the 2 that can talk are a bit old and call me Mom). It's the fact that my HUSBAND always refers to me as Mommy. I really have a pretty first name, I would love to hear him use it.

Yes I do have oodles of character. And there is often bits of crayons and playdoh in the cracks of my character. I wouldn't trade my boys for anything. They are so much fun. They are even more special since the twins are both autistic as well.

No wonder your feeling tired greenknight! I'm so sorry to hear that. My children are my greatest gifts, I'm sure you feel the same way. My ex-husband doesn't have much to do with our 2 sons either. It's his loss, and your wife's. Kids are hard and challenging and time consuming, and at the end of the day I am 100 times more self aware than I was at the beginning. I know to the full extent the best and worst parts of my own character. Raising kids doesn't give you character it CARVES it into you! Congratulations greenknight, I bet you have oodles of character :o)

Even as a man I can empathize with you ReddBrown. I get to play Daddy and Mommy because my wife is too wrapped up in her self, her hobbies and her interests. At least your husband pours a bit into River's life. My kids are ignored to a great degree. I'm the one that gets them off to school, is there for them after school. Fixes them dinner, gets them to bed...etc..

Yeap....this is definately creepy and not good for the baby...<br />
"And just for the record, that ain't love he's givin that baby. He's just USING it for protection. Poor River is going to grow up thinking he has to take care of all of daddy's emotional needs"

You are not being selfish and unreasonable at all. And yes, it is very common to be jealous of the affection the child gets ESPECIALLY when it has replaced the affection you used to get. While it is understandable that TIME would be in short supply with a new baby, the LOVE should multiply.<br />
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If hubby is picking up the baby every time you have a tiff, then he is obviously a coward and and an @ss. He's HIDING behind a baby and using it a shield. And just for the record, that ain't love he's givin that baby. He's just USING it for protection. Poor River is going to grow up thinking he has to take care of all of daddy's emotional needs. Yeah, "ooky" is real accurate word.

Thanks you guys....does anybody else feel like they married their father? Ooky. It's like an oedipal nightmare over here. I guess I saw a little bit of it before we got married but now that's it's 2 years into it? CREEPY. I must be really ill. Another thing...is anybody else jealous of their own babies? I know that sounds terrible and don't get me wrong, I ADORE my son, but now all my husband cares about is him. If we get into an arguement, the first thing my husband does is go pick up my son and cuddle him. Sometimes it feels like he's just trying to show me that he really is a loving and affectionate person, it's just me that doesn't deserve it. I AM really glad tha he is such a loving and hands-on Dad. River will be 1 year old on Saturday and we haven't gone on 1 outing without him since he was born. Am I being selfish and unreasonable?

Take charge Sweets! Bring in the baby sitter, dress to the Nines, overdo the perfume, and go dancing. Bet "date night" doesn't stop after you push the h.s. girl out the front door. I'll also bet if you wait 'till a slow dance and take your tongue out of his ear that if you whisper, "Hon, please don't ever refer to me as mommy," it will never, ever happen again.

I definitely think its the partners. i totally can relate to you because i feel like shooting myself in the *** for getting married. my world is so different now and not in a good way. i miss being free so much. but there are people that still act like newlyweds and still have sex like rabbits and still travel. we just have deadbeats that take us for granted.

Hey Mommy! Just kidding!! But that was pretty funny. In all seriouness, I feel your pain. I've been married 4.5 years and the whole time it's been a real challenge. I long for the days when I could do as I please; when going out on a date was exciting; and when I could go to my own place after a night out and feel like my own person. If I had any idea it would feel this confining, I would have never married BUT perhaps it's not marriage but the partners we chose that failed to meet our expectations.

Hit me up and we'll talk! compare notes!! HAHA!!

I'm sorry!!!!! My best friend and I always talk about what it was like before marriage. Been friends for 31 yrs. the good ole days!!!! Those were the times. I wouldn't trade the fam, but -- I can so relate !!!