Felt Like I Almost Died

Last night i almost died from pain or so it felt like. Talking with my friend about her bf literally causes physical pain in my chest. I couldnt fall asleep because my mind started racing as she spoke about her issues/happiness etc. I drifted between flashbacks of me n him to the possibility of ever coming across him and that girl. I couldnt take it, i was short of breath as i lay there cluthcing my heart because it felt like someone was driving an anvil thru it between the weight and the sharp pains. It's ridiculous i know, but i felt it, i guess the mind is a powerful thing afterall. It took 2 hours of distraction to calm down and the fear of dreaming of my fears was almost just as unbearable. I toss and turn and constantly lie awake at night. I'm emotionally and physically drained. I thought it was a panic attack or a heart attack. It's insane to feel this way, it's horrible to love so much. He's taken all of my love and left with me with nothing. I'm empty inside.
This isnt my first broken heart no it's my 2nd, but the first one was too young for it to ever really be considered forever just a young love sort of thing though 1st lovesa are no joke either . This time it was different....we were on our way and i think thats what hurts the most. To be fully invested in someone and combine lives and then without a moments notice have it all ******** away. It's like someone cut off my air supply and im forever going about my day struggling just to breathe. When will it get better?
Agnes8409 Agnes8409
1 Response Sep 25, 2012

I feel your pain. I'm going thru the same thing right now, and it's unbearable to miss someone that much, that means that much to you. I'm sending up a prayer for you right now.