Trying

I am trying so hard to move on, I cut you out of my life completely, but it is still sad when I think about it. I thought you were the one and I honestly never felt that way before, the way I felt about you was so strong and now you're gone and you don't care. I am trying to keep busy with school and stuff but I just want to feel loved again. I am finding it hard to find a man and I don't know why but it is started to affect my self esteem, I have a lot of struggles ahead of me and things to overcome, I just thought you would be there for me through them and you're not. I am being as strong as possible, but I really just need someone to be there for me now, I want a new relationship, I don't want to be bitter and hate men because of what I have been through. I want to trust again and love again, I am also scared I will never feel as strongly for anyone as I did for you. It just doesn't seem worth it anymore. I am frustrated and alone and I feel isolated in the world. I feel like no one wants me and I know that I am worth more than this, its just hard when my life has seemed to be one struggle after the next. Other people don't have to deal with all these things, I just don't get it. When will I finally get to keep happiness? When can I have what I have wanted for so long and everyone else has? I feel so invisible, like I don't exist.
be2cute be2cute
22-25, F
Sep 22, 2012