Ahh Cliche

I get to see him occasionally now. but wish that I could see him more. he says that he loves me, and thats exactly what I want to hear. and I love him more than anything. its hard to see him go, to leave when he must. I love just having him around. I know that he has had many many hard trials in life. and I want to be there for him. but at the same time it all seems to good to be true. I worry that one day he will wake up and not feel the same. I worry that his views may change. Ive never had anyone love me the way he does. just as Ive never loved anyone the way I love him. when I think of us, I don't know why, but I think of Romeo and Juliet. I know, its a cliche, but that is just what comes to mind. tho, more complicated than them. there are times when I just want to drop whatever it is that im doing, right at that very moment, and leave, walk out, and go to him. but im afraid. im afraid of who's life that will effect. and i don't mean just mine. i mean my daughters' as well. ive gotten to the point in my life where i don't know much of anything anymore. and my mind races all day long. and most of the time it revolves around him. he says that he wants to see me every day. and that he wants to be with me. he's told me that he wants to have children with me! and all that i love to hear. im worried tho that one day it will change. that he will stop being the individual that he is today. and i don't want that to happen. i don't want us to turn into 2 old haggish people that hate each other but stay together "just because". every time we say goodbye and hug, i never want to let go. every time he leaves it brings tears to my eyes. knowing that i don't know when ill get to see him again. and worried that one day i may do something to scare him off, or to push him away.
I have more to tell, but maybe another day
bloodrayne bloodrayne
22-25, F
1 Response Aug 21, 2007

But if you going to be afraid you going to watch your life pass by, yes we all are scared and we also don’t know whats going to happen. In this world there are 70 per cent of guys that are dogs and 20 per cent are gay but there is that 10 per cent out there of honest loving guys how are we going to know if he is 1 of that 10 per cent if we don’t try some thing.