Breaking up is hard to do

I recently ended a 2 year relationship with my fiance. I ended it because the relationship was so consuming, I love him but I felt suffocated and had no time for friends or family. He also expected me to sacrifice a lot. He wanted me to quit my job that I love, pull my teenage son out of school and transfer to another highschool and move to the city where he lives. When I broke up with him initially I just needed space to clear my head. 2 months went by and neither one of us contacted each other. Then out of the blue he calls me and invites me on a date where we share an amazing evening together opening up, expressing our feelings and love for each other. For 10 days after this date I tried contacting him, thinking we still had a chance to get back together. He would not answer or return my calls. Finally on day 10 he answers his phone and tells me he is seeing someone new. Now I am forced to work through my heartbreak and move on. Sometimes you don'tknow how deep your feelings are for another person until it is too late.


I wrote this experience over a year ago. Update I am fine now but at the time I wrote this I was hurting. It's funny looking back now. I believe everything happens for a reason. He moved on and is still with this same girl now after a year. He is not treating her well though. He did some plumbing work at my cousins house recently. She is married and he still lives with this girl and he was very flirty and made some sexual inuendos towards my cousin. Then he started calling her  and text messaging her and driving by her house. She had to get nasty with him and tell him off but it got ugly! Her husband finally got wind of all this and one night while my cousin had stepped out to go to the store my ex called her and her husband answered the phone. My cousin had already prewarned her hubby of what was going on. So her husband had a few words with him and he finally stopped! All this is so nuts! I can't believe I was so heartbroken over a guy who could be capable of doing this kind of thing!

cmost cmost
36-40, F
3 Responses Feb 3, 2007

My problem with this is that he asked you to give up so much! What was he going to give up and why did you son have to be moved around? While I know you love him and I know it hurts, I question how worthy he is of your love.

I feel for you really I do, it's now day 5 since I've heard from my sweetheart, I love him with all my heart, but he won't even let me know if it's over or not?<br />
A friend once told me that "IGNORANCE IS A COWARDS WAY OF LETTING YOU KNOW ITS OVER" I would like to believe that, but for all the text messages that tell me how much he loves me and misses me, then to just ignore me, I don't know what is going on, but sometimes you have to face facts and realise that no matter what you do, he's going to do what he wants to do and there isn't a dam thing you can do about it.<br />
I'm guessing that maybe there was always someone on the side lines and he was with you because he didn't know where the other relationship was going, I'm dreading the day that the love of my life gets back in touch, [if he ever does] and finally tells me that it's over or he has someone else, it's just going to kill me!!<br />
I'm Sorry you feel bad, but just know that sooner or later I will feel exactly as you do.

It sounds like he did it to make HIM self feel better. Hope you can get through this. Someone better will come in your life.