Between Me And My Best Friend, An Ocean

When I was in college I lost touch with my high school friends and kind of drifted on through school alone.  In 2006 I decided one day to take a self-defense class thinking hey I might learn some stuff to show off for the ladies (isn't that what we all think lol) .  In this class is where I met my best friend or as she and I both like to say, and I know it may sounds silly, BFF's.  Around this time I was thinking about transfering to two other schools but something in my head told me to stay where I was and to this day I believe it was because I was going to meet her.  She changed my life in a way that no one else had really in my life.  We spent so much time together hanging out, partying, going on road trips, and running around town until the crack of dawn. 

She introduced me to hundreds of people because she knew so many people in our area and pretty soon wherever part of town I would be in I would see people I know.  She opened me up to new things, like dancing which I never did but we went to so many clubs she actually trained me how to pick up chicks but showing out some moves.   She taught me how to cook certain meals and how to really clean a house.  She would plan surprises for my birthdays and even took me shopping for clothes( cuz I guess I needed some lol). 

Even when I was dating other girls I split my time with them and her( this actually never really got in the way of anything, she was always excited to meet my new girlfriend and always wanted to hang out with us).  She had alot of great and not so great past events in her life and she would talk for hours about them to me and she told lots of things she wouldn't tell anyone else ( id guess about 80% of her life).  It never mattered what was going on or what time of the day it was we always made time to talk to each other, about the good and the bad. 

She is my best support system even though I try to handle things on my own there are some things I would go to her about even before going to my parents.  Just last year she met a young NATO pilot who was training here in the U.S.  After a few months she was completely fallen for him( he had also fallen for her)  and she was happiest I ever seen her and it made me feel so happy as well to see her like that.  I cant describe how that made me feel to this day i still can't.  In November of last year she told me she was moving with him to Europe to live there for at least 2 years. 

As much as I wanted her to stay it would have been completely selfish of me to fight her decision, so I embraced it knowing that here new found happiness was long overdue.  The last night I was able to see her I felt so awful and actually broke down.  I realized that I had spent so much time with her, I forgot how things were before I met her.  I gave her the tightest hug I've ever given anybody( my mother included and love my mother to death) and when she called me to tell me her flight was leaving it was like a freight train had just run me over. 

Since she left I have struggled to get used to it but I am making progress.  Because she is unable to talk to me right now it feels like she is gone completely and the first month was awful.  I actually had trouble making decisions without being able to ask her for advice.  I have had violent and intense nightmares, and my energy level dropped.  Last month was on the darkest months I've had in my life(sad part is thats when my bday is)

But like I said I am getting better and things have lightened up.  Although I miss my best friend more than I could have imagined I realize its nice that people in this world can mean that much to you.  And she definitely means that much to me!!!

Antwan1914 Antwan1914
26-30, M
Feb 10, 2010