How Do You Cope When Your Partner Goes To Jail ?

Hello, my name is Leah. Im 20 & have a 2 yr old son and am 10 weeks pregnant. I've been with my partner for 3 years. He was sentenced when i was 5 weeks pregnant and recieved 5 years with a suspended sentence at 18 months. It's only been 5 weeks and I feel like I cannot handle another 17 months. To go from having your partner there when you wake up and falling asleep next to them, to a few 15 minute phone calls a week and letters ? How can anyone do that ? It seems like when a person is punished for their crime, their family is punished aswell. I am a law abiding citizen and my partner committed his crime a year before our relationship began. I knew he commited this offense and accepted that he would be sentenced at some time. My problem is that for an offense which I believe to be minor (selling some ecstasy pills) four years ago after he has shown he has not re-offended and has taken numerous drug tests which were clear, he has made a family and has been a hard worker and provided for us, but to now sentence him and take it all away from him after such progress seems like the system has allowed him to take 5 steps forward and 6 steps back by putting him away. All his progress just to be out away. I'm finding that difficult I find the Australian justice system I be a joke, I know little about it or other countries but in Australia a murderer can recieve 7 years, yet a drug trafficker can recieve 25 years. I feel as tho there are much worse crimes that go without the attention they need as the system is for some reason targeting drugs and drug involvement, yet children are abused and raped daily, women are sold as sex slaves and our police are putting such a large amount of resources into catching petty criminals that sell some pills in a nightclub. I am in no way condoning his crime I am 100% anti-drugs I believe they ruin lives and families I am just stating my opinion that prisons are being filled with petty criminals as apposed to serious criminals that inflict harm on others intentionally. (yes I am aware drugs can cause serious harm again I'm not saying its alright). A crime is a crime yes and he committed one and is facing those consequences, he will not be there to hold my hand through labor nor will he be there to cut the umbilical cord, watch his child laugh or crawl. I am wriing too much I think ! Ill leave it at: this seems so unfair and I hate the situation I am in I just want him home and there for his children and myself. This is going to be hard and I have no idea how to deal with this. I am young and with two children on my own I do not know how am going to cope. I guess I have to stay strong and think positive as it would no doubt be just as hard for him being inside away from us. Atleast I have distractions. I think I just need people to talk to I think talking will make it easier. I find myself crying everyday. And not having anyone to talk to is hard. So anyone that will give advice please do. I'm pretty lost I won't lie. Sorry for writing so much ! Thanks for reading, Leah x
Leah3 Leah3
18-21, F
2 Responses Dec 15, 2012

Hi :)
I have been with my boyfriend for 6 months just from those months I realized hes the one for me without a doubt. But a year before we got togthere he was charged with growing and trafficking Pot. Now he has 30 months in jail, so a year and a half..I fell apart for the first month that he's been gone and now I just feel numb inside.. I was living with him, now I'm back with my mom it's insanley hard but it will end and he will be back just know that :),,I'm sorry I coudnt image being pregnant and going through this struggle of loss though.. my prayers are with you, hope to hear back from you!

I am not exactly goin through everything ur going through however My boyfriend was arrested today and i was asking myself the same question how am i going to sleep tonight!!! Wsll its almost 1 and i find myself with insomnia

It's a horrible feeling hope you're ok ! Here if you need to talk, I've found talking about it makes it that bit easier !

I agree with that as well. Found this site by accident looking For the jail number and I was amazed to see how many girls were going threw this to.