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I Miss My Boyfriend

Wow first of all im happy i found this site..i thought i was the only one...

Anyways im 18 and had been going out with this guy i met for almost 6 months..i know its not a long time but the conection was just there i dont know how to explain it...we met at work, he was kinda shy to tlk to me and i thought it was so0o cute..well as akward as it was at first we grew closer and closer..i secretly loved him but never had the courage to tell him which is my biggest regret..he was the best boyfriend by far that ive ever had and i know im young but i dont think ill find anyone like him ever again..he treated me like a princess and thats wat he called me..his princess..and he was my prince charming! i miss him so0o much words cant even describe it...i dont know why god took him away..he wasnt a gangster or drug addict or anything close to that. he always had a cheezy smile on his face and loved making everyone laugh ..he was truly an angel..he passed away because of alcohol poisoning..he wasnt an alcoholic he was just celebrating his diploma and drank too much and too fast..so to all those teens reading this ITS TRUE u can die from alcohol so please be careful!! you dont believe it until it happens to someone close to you...the worst thing is that i wasnt even with him the weekend it happend..i was with my friends and him with his...i cant help but blame myself for not being there and not helping him..but then again i wonder how his friends feel who were actually there and still did nothing but encourage him to chug! ugh it makes me angry but the lord taught me to forgive...he loved to sing to me until i fell asleep and the very first song he ever sang to me was about a guy having to leave his girl..it says if tomorow you feel lonely its okay i promise my princess ill be back..please stop your crying..sometimes in life you dont get wat u want..it hurst so much having to leave you..i promise i will be thinking of you..i play this song over and over and i cant believe he dedicated it to me from the begining who woulda thought this woulda happend..he was my prom date and everyone said u usually marry ur prom date..i feel so lost and cold hearted i dont know who i am anymore...i never herd of a fairytale with two princes' =[  i really need god..but its hard to go to church on my own...i feel soo alone eventhough my friends offer their support i dont want to bother them..i dont cry in public bcuz i dont want people to think im weak..but as soon as its time to go to bed..i cry till i fall asleep...i dont wish this pain on my worst enemy...and i am sorry for all of u girls that are going thru the same i would love to hear from you...its been two monts now and it is a lil better mayb cuz i like to repress the thoughts or maybe im truly moving on with life i dont know but wat i do know is that i would do anything to bring him back...god have mercy on his beautiful soul...

SaDGuRl SaDGuRl 18-21 1 Response Nov 21, 2008

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I'm really sorry,and I say this cuz I know how u feel. I lost my bf 3 years ago,and it still hurts like 1st day. I still love him like first day ... Everyone think I'm ok,and don't even remember,cuz they don't see me cry at night.I would give everything to bring him back but we just can't,no matter what we do. Life just isn't fair ... And please,I tried to find that song that u wrote but I couldn't,so if u know the name of the song send me. Or if u just need to talk to someone bout that,I'm here ...