I Miss My Victor Baby Cat!!!
Hi everyone, I'm new here and I've never grieved so much over a pet in my entire life. I'm distraught because my 8 month old kitty, Victor, got hit by a car yesterday afternoon and died. :( I miss him more than any other pet I've ever lost. It started out like a normal day, my friend Judy came over and visited my mom and I. Later on, my adopted mom and I were barbecuing chicken on the grill. I stayed outside and watched the grill and my mom was inside making the pasta. I try so hard to keep our cats from going outside, but it's impossible when you have several kitties crowding around the door and you try to push them back but at least one or two of them will always find a way to wiggle around your ankles and head out the door. While I was outside turning the food over on the grill, Victor was outside, I got distracted by a car coming with this Bozo bopping up and down to music in his car and didn't realize Victor was crossing the road at the time. The idiot's car swerves over towards the curb where Victor was crossing the road, and he would have made it had the car went straight rather than taking a sudden swerve. Poor Victor got hit and I panicked as I saw Victor tumble over on the grass :( The a$$hole drove off and didn't even care about what had happened. I picked up my sweet Victor and I died on the inside as his body felt limp. I hurried inside to get my mom and she rushed us over to the vet to see if there was anything they could do, but they said he was already gone :'( It was then I just started crying uncontrollably, it felt like the end of the world. The vet got a towel to wrap sweet Victor's body in, and we took him home and buried him in our backyard. I hate myself and still feel the guilt, if I had rushed out to the middle of the road when I had my chance to stop the driver, Victor would still be here now. I feel like I failed Victor, it was my responsibility to protect him as well as the other kitties. I feel so lost and empty without Victor in my life, he was like a child to me. Even though 8 months isn't a long time to have a pet, I loved and cared for Victor from the time he was born. His mom (one of our other kitties) Allie had given birth to Victor and his sisters in the closet while we were visiting relatives over the weekend. We came home and found Allie and her babies in my closet, and watched them grow from there. I love each and every one of them, but Victor became my special one. I gave them individual love and attention, but bonded with Victor the most and he became my favorite. He would climb down my shoulder while I would be stretching out on the sofa and would snuggle on my chest for almost an hour at times. He would close his eyes and purr contentedly while I would stroke his soft fur. I would snuggle with the other kitties as well, but I had to almost beg them to snuggle with me, whereas with Victor, he would come to me on his own. I don't understand why God had to let him die at such a young age, he was still practically a baby. He had his whole life ahead of him and a family that loved him, including his momma, Allie, and his sisters, Cocoa, Cupcake, and Pumpkin. I don't understand the point of God bringing Victor into our lives, giving us so much love and happiness, and suddenly take him from us after 8 months. It seems way too unfair and I wish God would have put Victor's soul back to his body and gave him another chance to be with us. When I woke up this morning, my grief was at its peak, because I've become so accustomed to waking up to Victor being curled up next to me. Every morning when I'd wake up, he'd always be there, and it didn't seem right waking up and realizing Victor was gone. When I was a child, I lost a black and white kitty I had named Fluffy, after ten years of him being with us to feline leukemia. I grieved and took his death very hard too, but this experience with losing Victor was different because I never saw it coming and expected to have many more years with him. It's so hard to come to terms with the fact I'll never see Victor's sweet face again or snuggle him in my arms again :( I'm glad I have my mom to help me get through this, she's been so patient and comforting me. Home just doesn't seem the same without Victor around. He had the kind of energy about him that could light up an entire room. He had something special and unique about him that made him stand out. He had so much character and vitality, and was also so loyal and affectionate. He was everything I could love in a kitty cat. I feel so hopeless because I know no matter what I do or say, nothing is going to bring him back. :'(