I Need Something Positive...

alright ladies.. I haven't been on for a long time.. Been really caught up with my soldier and him deploying.. Spending as much time with him as i can before he left. He has been deployed now for a couple of weeks. Not going to lie its the hardest thing i have EVER done in my life! I remember the first time when he told me that he was deploying. I thought to myself, no big deal, I've gone through a lot in life and i can handle this. He means the world to me. They say when you know when its "the one" and well we both do :) Sucks that the deployment came up right in the middle of things. but everything happens for a reason.. I was reading a lot of your guys post about your soldiers being deployed and them coming back.. Doesn't seem really positive.. I know ever relationship is different and every soldier goes through something different in their deployment. I know when they come back they are "stuck in the sand box" mode.. I understand that they aren't going to be the same and either are you and that you both have to understand that.. so what i'm wondering is when your soldier came home, how did you guys make it threw everything.. I need something positive. Something to know that hey its not all going to end bad.. It's my biggest fear is losing him.. You guys hear the stories.. Blah.. So ladies any advice?

I really appreciate it :)
KChristensen KChristensen
18-21, F
4 Responses Oct 20, 2010

I met my soldier just last July of 2010. 7 months and now he's gone to Texas then to Aphganistan til Feb. 2012. The positive? He's coming back . He is a professional soldier . They love doing what they do. I love shopping, he loves being a soldier. They have the training to do this! My suggestion, I am going to learn how to crochet him a blanket. That will keep me busy. Try it. Pick his color and make something. Kim in N.H.

its been a few months since you wrote this so i was just wondering how everytihng went? is he home? if so, is he doing ok and are you? my husband is in afghanistan for his second deployment so i def understand what you are saying about them being a little different when they return. When my husband got back last time he still was the same person like still giving me kisses and being sweet and all that. but for the first month and a half or so he was more irritable and kind of mean. I mean he would snap at people and cuss more bc the other guys did alot thier. he also didnt wanna go out as often as i did bc he was soo not used to all the people and noise. like when we were at the mall he was very aware of all the loud people. when he was thier their ba<x>se got attacked so he had bad dreams about seeing all the graphic things that he did. so it may have been different than normal people react im not sure. i think also the 1st deployment is harder on them, i hope atleast i gues i will see in august when he comes home.

Thanks for the advice.. He always tells me when we talk that he misses me and loves me.. and is always thinking about me. SO that helps. I didn't think of looking at that, that way :)

I'm only in the first month of my Marine's deployment and I understand your worry. It is really scary thinking that the person that you fell in love with might not be there when he gets back. I've started hearing those stories and rumors about how they come back completely different. The only think that keeps me sane is that the few times I have talked to him since he's been there, he always says he loves me and misses me. He lets me know that he still cares for me and until he stops saying both of those things, I'm not going to worry about him changing. I know that I'm going to have to adjust when he comes back and I am more than happy to be there for him at any moment and not push him for information. <br />
But seriously, I get by just because he still says he loves me and misses me. Those things alone have kept me from making any drastic decisions. <br />
Maybe talk to him about how you are feeling?<br />
Let me know if you ever need to talk!<br />
*Sara