Leeloo My Light

My bass player called me out of the blue asking if I wanted a dog. Thats how leeloo came into my life. The first thing she did when we met was lick my cheek and grunt in my ear. I would discover later that was one of her signs of contentment. I brought her home to my farm and she was home. I have no fences or boundaries so she was as free as she could be, whereas before me she was kept in a kennel in a small apartment with 5 people. Needless to say she was happy. She was a rat terrier, highly energetic, so sweet and loving, so my nickname for her was Leeloo love love. She had so many different expressions of love and happiness and was just so interesting. It really hurts to write this next part down. One evening I came home and she was laying in a small pile of leaves, dying, if I had gotten home an hour later she would have been dead. I loaded her up in my vehicle and drove an hour to the nearest animal ER which was in waco tx. I cried the entire time and tenderly petted her and talked to her. I didnt know what was wrong with her. They ran tests and couldnt tell me why she was so sick. They ended up telling me it was parvo, but I guess Ill never know. She lived through the night and in the morning I took her to a vet so they could continue treatment, she lived that day as well. Once again tests were run and once again I didnt know what was wrong. I believed that she would pull through. The next morning as I was leaving for work, the vet called me and said she had taken a turn for the worst and that I should come there, which I did. I had to make one of the hardest descisions in my life and I tearfully signed the papers to have her put to sleep. I still dont know what made her sick. Its like god needed her with him. Anyway, this happened on 12/12/12 and my grief has been getting worse. I keep having dreams of her grunting in my ear and waking up looking for her. Its so hard to write this with tears in my eyes. Whats really hard is the last time I saw her well, she was just sitting in front of my house watching me as I got into my car which was weird. Usually she tries to jump in my car to go too, so I got out of my car and walked back to her and knelt down and petted her and told her Ill be back soon baby I love you youre a good girl, I mean what was that about? Was she trying to tell me something? She was a year and a half old and a spitfire of wild energy. I just dont undrestand and its eating me up. I really miss her and I feel robbed and I dont know what to do about it. In all actuality theres nothing I can do, I guess thats what hurts the worst. I have her ashes and I initially was going to spread them on my private lake at home but I just dont want to leave her alone anymore. I cant look at pictures of her without weeping and Im about to purchase a new home and my wife said we should get a dog but i just cant because Ill never get the closure Ill need from the loss of my beautiful Leeloo. I named her after the character in the movie The Fifth Element, for those of you who havent seen it, basically the world gets saved be the four elements, earth, air, fire, water, but the most important one is love. She sure saved my with her love and I couldnt return the favor and now its eating me up. Can anyone ease this with some kind words or anything? I would greatly appreciate it. In closing, I just ask that you go to your pet, get on their level, and give them some love, it means so much to them and one day youll wish you had just one chance to do it. Thanks for reading Adam
SirSpectre SirSpectre
31-35, M
4 Responses Feb 8, 2013

Sir, my heartfelt sympathy for your loss, it must have been very tough to deal with. The hardest lesson to learn here I think is to understand that some of our dearest friends we will ever have walk on paws. She is waiting for you.....

Sir, my heartfelt sympathy for your loss, it must have been very tough to deal with. The hardest lesson to learn here I think is to understand that some of our dearest friends we will ever have walk on paws. She is waiting for you.....

Very sad story. I do understand your pain. I wrote a story about my 'Candace', she was amazing as well. Pets are such loving creatures. May all pet owners cherish theirs while they have these moments to enjoy with them.


All the best to you!

Adam's wife says:
My darling, Leeloo knows how much you loved and still love her. Remind yourself of happy times we had with her.