When I began my senior year in high school I was 17 going on 18. About two weeks in I got invited by a friend to join her with a group of her guy friends so I figured if there's other guys to talk to I'd go. After meeting (we'll call them Josh and nick) her friends I really enjoyed their company. Two days later she again invited me to join her Josh and Nick and I happily joined them. After a couple days nick called me and asked if just me and him wanted to hang out so I met up with him after about a year it was a group of 4 of us. We loved each other more than anything. I knew them more than some family members. I have realized that those years were the best years of my life. Not a day, not one single day goes by I don't feel down because I can't seem to let go of the fact that those days are gone. But Josh became a theif and druggie then moved away. Soon after nick and I smoked a little weed here and there. But after a while nick started smoking everyday more than 5 times a day. I still only enjoyed it once every few days. This cycle went on and on to the point that I couldn't take it anymore. It hurt always seeing him high. It hurt really bad. To the point that I decided to completely cut contact. But it ended up hurting even more. I worried about him so I apologized for letting him go. But he was still the same. Nothing has changed. I couldn't see him that way. all this happen in the course of 4 years. Here I am going on 21. I still think of them. I still listen to the same music we used to listen to. It's saddening but it let's me live those days for a few minutes and it's a very pleasurable poison to me. Nothing since has compared. I miss my best friend
BaristaPride BaristaPride
22-25, M
Aug 16, 2014