I dated a girl for 3 years.

I experienced a deeper a love for her than for anyone I have ever loved before. She was absolutely beautiful to me, inside and out. Our relationship was very mature. Communication was key. We shared in our faith life together and pushed each other to become better people. She was there for me when times were tough and I was there for her. I let her in closer than anyone else. I told her all of my deepest secrets and I told her about my aspirations. She told me that I was her best friend and her lover. She told me countless times that she wanted to marry me. I truly believed that this was the girl I was going to marry.

I found love with her in all of the areas that I value the most: faith, friendship, and honesty. Shortly after our three-year anniversary she broke up with me. We spent a week apart and ten met up. I was hoping beyond hope that we would be getting back together. We did not. She told me that she had this feeling in her heart that she wanted to discover who she was on her own. I asked her if she still loved me and she just shook her head 'no'. She told me about how she had heard of a couple who split up for a couple months in college and then got together and stayed together ever since.

This all happened almost three months ago. I understand that pain is a part of life, but I am really struggling to be hopeful. We attend the same school, so I have had to see her every now and then.

Part of what makes this difficult is that I have this feeling that I will anyone as great and as beautiful as her. Also, in my heart of hearts, I want to be with her. I keep having dreams at night where we get back together.

I know that if we would end up getting back together that it would be a new relationship. I just don't think I could handle putting myself out there again for her, just for her to turn me down again and to say that she still doesn't love me.

I've limited my contact with her. I deleted her number from my phone and I haven't spoken to her in over a month. I have blocked her information on facebook, but her picture still pops up in the chat window. I was never too into facebook, but now I wince every time I log on. I'm just not sure what to do.

I am trying to be smart and mature in this time, but I just feel so broken.
panther867r panther867r
22-25, M
6 Responses Jun 7, 2014

Bro I relate to this so much. Just take life as it comes, for me it was a long process to move on. I would still get back with her if she was wanting to be with me. Moving on is tough bro especially when you see yourself being with her for longer!

That really sounds painful, but I can say that is an accomplishment to be together for 3 years wow!!! Pain is horrible, when you're missing someone you love, but you can find someone else, even if that thought isn't comforting at the very least you experience something as beautiful as that, think of all the people who never have experiences true love, it's a lonely road.

Truth is, in this world, in some way or another you'll loose the people you love. So it isn't about always having someone. It's about appreciating what you have when you have it, and once it's gone being thankful you ever had the opportunity to experience it in the first place!

Guys really care about that? In my home, I was taught to believe all men wanted was sex and nothing more. That emotional intimacy was like 5% of the equation. You really think guys need a shoulder to cry on too. That they crave women for more than what their body can provide and for their intellect?

Absolutely. Some guys just want to hit it and quit, but a lot of guys out there are in it for the intimacy, stimulating conversations, and the personality as well.

That's good to know. It really restores my faith in humanity. I wish my mom understood that and would stop saying all guys want is to sleep with you smh!

Just remember that you'll get through it. :)

same page here..happend 4 weeks ago, still fresh hurts like crazy

Sorry to hear that apetz

I feel ur pain my other half just asked for space to find himself.... Again.... After 11 yrs. he says it's him not me and I've cut him off to give him space it hasn't even been 24 hrs and I'm not sure how I'm gona make it. Told him to contact me when he's decided either way but I have a feeling he's gona end it like ur girlfriend did. The last time we broke up I had found someone else but I kept consign him to the love of my life so he cud never match up and it didn't work. I think now I cud have lost someone special but now il never know. Maybe we need to find a way to let go cos if we think no1 will ever match up we already setting ourselves up for failure

Letting go is what I'm struggling with. I know deep down that I can do it, it's just going to be tonight and will take some time

Yeah me too :-(