Tired of Her Memory Kicking My ***.

Who would someone be to lie about missing their ex? Emotional cripple! Well, right about now being what I used to be would come in handy. Sundays are the worst. In the decade we had, whether seperated by the distance from L.A. to S.D. or living together in our house in Monrovia, sunday was our day. When we had no money, we would take a walk and talk. When we had it all, it would be a day of going to Huntington Beach for breakfast, then whatever happened to pop into mind. Sunday meant laying in bed watching Extreme Makeover Home Edition. God, I hated that show. But, now I find myself watching it alone every sunday, wondering if she is watching too. I could go on and on, like we all do on here, I mean it is EP. Essentially a big crying location on the net.

I wish I could strike a balance between missing her and being able to remember 'us' w/o getting mad or sad. I can't figure out if I want to beat someone senseless or cry like a ***** to get this pain to go away. I am good at beating someone senseless, but in no way want to hurt anyone ever again, yet crying like a ***** makes me want to drink myself into someplace else. I fear someone or something will catch the wrong end of my pain, and I soooo do not want that to happen! I feel so volitile. Always have to an extent, but recently have put that nonsense to rest. But, here it comes again all brought about by the pain of missing her and knowing it is my fault. 

EricS EricS
36-40, M
9 Responses Sep 21, 2008

it happens i believe you because i miss my ex when we first broke up i didnt want it to work he would tell me he missed me he would watch the shows i did he would miss me and not do anything at the time i didnt care and now i find myself missing him more then ever , try to contact her you might get rejected or not but dont live your life never knowing .

Memories kicking ***. I'm right there with ya. lol It's been 9 years all freakin ready. I don't know if it gets any easier... but when you believe you've had the best and let it go (like I did... what a dumbass, lol).... hmmm.

Over her? After over 3 years: I'm as close to over my ex wife as I can be. I've moved on and all. It is what it is.

Why don't you call her? Are you feeling better now.. and are you over her yet?

so if a break up is my fault and its been about a month.. i have seen she is going out on dates & partying (which she never used to want to do), do i contact her telling her how sorry i am and how much pain im in? <br />
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im so confused with what to do because i have never been sad about a break up before until now.

Give it some time...it will play out and true intentions will show. But, you said he is calling you telling you this or that...??

It's only been two weeks. And he is in love with another woman.

You may want to at least listen to him see what he's about now. I can't speak for all guys but I sure mean what I say.

My ex-boyfriend keeps contacting me to tell me the same story. I don't believe him. He broke it off with me to be with the others girls he was dating and sleeping with while we where still in a relationship. He broke my heart. It is hard to believe that someone could hurt someone they love in such hurtful ways. I do believe you are in pain. So maybe he is too.