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I Realized Time Is Going So Fast.

I'm almost 34 years old.  I've lived nearly 1000 miles away from my immediate family for close to 12 years now.  I just got home from a one-week road trip to visit them.  Since I've gotten home, I've been really sad and even cried some.  I think the visit showed me just how much time has passed and how everyone is getting older.  I see my family several times a year, so I don't know exactly why I'm being affected so much by this visit.  I remember how my mom and grandmother would cry when we would have to say goodbye on visits when I was a kid.  I never understood how they felt until now.
azhix azhix 31-35 61 Responses Jun 28, 2010

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I understand how you feel. I live over 1000 miles away from my family for almost 23 years now. It's getting more difficult as I get older and realize how much I need them and how they need me. I was just with them two weeks in June and now I'm back home and I feel so empty. I have been feeling this emptiness for many years now, I guess about 3 years. I really don't know what the future holds but I do feel in my heart that I do need my family in my life a lot more than I used to. God guide me to where I need to be. I just want to be happy and I don't see my life being happy without them..

I remember when I first moved 600 miles away and thought they were being silly, I would see them soon. I soon realized my husbands family were slowly replacing mine and felt incredibly guilty! I seriously questioned if I had been too selfish in my thinking. Hindsight is a by-product of maturity some times. Its not your fault. I really didn't start growing up seriously until around 35! All the other stuff was in place, job, home, kids, husband. For me, approaching forty meant seriousness. Not a bad thing at all...it happens naturally. You come to realize how important they really are in the whole of things. You also come to realize, they are aging. Its will be your turn to make sure they are ok. right?

I am sorry I for sure know how you feel. God Bless You

i lived a thousand miles away from my parents for 20 years.then i moved back

because my parents were getting older and needed help. I mowed their grass and helped with their shopping fixed a supper for them for years.my mother passed away in 2002 my wife in 2004 my father and my now wifes mother in 2009. I am 73 now and starting to know some of the aches and pains that they were going thru.

I am fortunate in that i have a new loving family. being all alone is not a thing to be desired.(at least not by me).as you may have seen if you have read some of my

stories it is my opinion that being alone sucks big time.

Better to be alone than with bad company...I disagree respectfully. I find some people to be so needy and willing to be with anyone rather than be with themselves. Sad. Take care!! Everyone is different.

I remember the first year I was in college and away from my parents. One morning I was setting in front of my make-up mirror, and realized I was Iooking at a reflection of my mother through my own eyes. All the sudden, I became very homesick for my mom and the weirdest senstation fell over me. I thought to myself that in 10 years my mom would die and I better make the best of it. Well the sad part was that I was right. 6 years later she was diagnosed with cancer and in 7 years she had died. The weird part is this. My best friend in Highschool remembered me saying one day, that when I had my own children, that my parents wouldn't be around for to see them. I do remember saying that. consiquently, I was pregnant with my first child when my mom died of cancer, and my youngest child was only 7 months old when my dad died. My oldest was 6. I think we just know, subcouniously. Hugs!

Sometimes in todays society. We fail to see how important family is. We cant just get up and leave without suffering some consequences. The American family has been torn apart the past few decades. Its time to come home.

Well think about it you travel 1000 miles and they stay right there. If they cared for you as much as you do about them then don't you think they may travel 1000 miles to see you and then they might cry a 1000 tears to know that you all are not together. I've learned this from my own family and that is they wouldn't travel 1 mile to see me and they damn sure wouldn't she a dry tear thinking of me. I've had to come ot realize that family (in my case) do give a crap about me. If I were to die today I don't believe they would even care. Thank God I have God and I insurance that takes care of my remains. I wouldn't trust my family to bury my dog. I have insurance on her to. She is my family and I will treat her with the best respect.



My family can treat themselves!

Friend , that is life, we have to face it, take life as it comes to you,Other reason is you are alone too,

When I was young I had chance to work in newyark, but I was not able to take my wife and one years old daughter,

I remember my daughter use to visit me in dream crying where you gone dad I loved her and my wife to much and missing was as horrible as i have nothing in life.

I decided to have my young age time with my family, So I came back to them and I know the pleasure when I meet them.

We got so short life and youth time is even more short.

I am survival but I am happy I spend all time with them, life goes on, we can not stop time, I am contented off course, and thanks too lord i got there love and company,

Can you not get job near to them,

I love this, I feel this way too but you have to live,b cause .we only get older,I'm 27 and I never understood when people told me I depended on my family too much and they wouldn't always be around,I had two beautiful grandmother's, my first child was the best thing that I could ever give them they were bout so excited,my dad's mom died 8 months before she was born and my mom's mom died 1 month before she was born which sent me into a dark depression and made it hard for me to be excited about my daughters birth,I am male and my grandmother's were my everything,I told my Mon I felt like God gave me my daughter to give me a reason to live because he knew I couldn't make it without my grandma's, my mom's mom raimed me and the closest relationship with my dad was his mom,anyways spend all the time you can with your family,hang In there!

I love this, I feel this way too but you have to live,b cause .we only get older,I'm 27 and I never understood when people told me I depended on my family too much and they wouldn't always be around,I had two beautiful grandmother's, my first child was the best thing that I could ever give them they were bout so excited,my dad's mom died 8 months before she was born and my mom's mom died 1 month before she was born which sent me into a dark depression and made it hard for me to be excited about my daughters birth,I am male and my grandmother's were my everything,I told my Mon I felt like God gave me my daughter to give me a reason to live because he knew I couldn't make it without my grandma's, my mom's mom raimed me and the closest relationship with my dad was his mom,anyways spend all the time you can with your family,hang In there!

I'm 51

My dad got transferred to Arkansas in 66 from Iowa . Every Christmas we would make the 12 hour drive to see both sets of grandparents and aunts and uncles and cousins . That all stopped my junior year of high school . Then it was only when my grandma on mom's side died that we went back then when my grandma on dad's side died on Christmas Eve in 85 we went back up . In 91 both grandpa's died mom's dad 5 days before our son was born and dad's dad 2 days before labor day when we took grandpa back for the service that was the last time I went to Iowa . I still have aunts and uncles and cousins that live up there . I have an aunt and uncle and their kids in Idaho and a aunt and uncle in California with 2 kids . I haven't seen any of them for 20+ year .I'd like for all of to get together 1 more time before they are all gone from this earth . But it's just a dream as most are in bad health but they say dreams come true sometimes .

irretrievable time is flying, as you know.



just spend as much time as possible with them, call as often as you can, send letters and cards on holidays.



i didn't see my favorite great uncle before he died and i will NEVER get over it. i wish i could have seen him one last time before he passed, or at least called him, and i will always regret no making my mom get in the car and see him, and she regrets it too.



so take it from me, the more you see them, the more you speak with them, the better it will be for all of you.

I once read a comment that time seems to pass very slowly to a child, but rather quickly to an adult. It seems that the older you get, the faster time seems to slip away. I suppose this may be due to the length of our memories in relation to the length of time we have been alive. To a kid last month might seem years ago. I certainly agree with that observation. I'm nearly 60 now and some of my boyhood friends have passed away. My father died about 2 1/2 years ago and my mother recently moved out of the apartment that I grew up in. It's depressing sometimes, but I now have a wonderful wife and two wonderful girls that are soon to enter college.

You should find some place in the middle 500 miles would be a lot better and maybe there is some place in the middle that you all would enjoy tell them do what you have to their all you have. I think there is alot of out here that wish we were in your shoes, Sad story but a great one thanks

When I originally graduated from college I move from my home to Burbank Califonia. I was almost 1600 miles from my family. I met a girl in Boston and we where 3000 miles apart. We go married and moved to be by my family. We stayed there for 10 years. I lost my job and found an opportunity in Reno. We moved to Reno and had a child. My next opportunity came up in Los Angeles. We stayed there 3 years. We decided that we had have enough. We moved back home for my family. My father in law passed away and I lost my job. It was a very agonizing experience. We where okay for most of the time. When we where at our lowest and needed the most, we got no consideration. Just after christmas one year, my daughter go the flu. I asked to borrow $500 from my parents which they had. My father would make me come over every day to ask for money since he felt that my wife wasted money. This was the lowest point in my life. I had about $10,000 in money comming in the next month but because the wanted to treat me like a little boy they would not help me. I signed my daugther up for medicare to get the Tamiflu for her. I will always remember that day.



I was able to get back on my feet and make a go of it. Then I lost my job again. I found a jog in another state from a friend I had worked with in Reno. My sister-in-law helped us get to the new job. Since then we have struggled but we are making it. For the first time in 5 years.



I realize that this is a long story. My advice for you is to verify the past. Make sure that what you think you have at home is really what you have. I realized that I was going to leave my edlerly parents behind. I asked them to come with me and they refused. Since that time my mother has gotten steadily worst and my father has stated that he is ready to die. I understand this. I explained to them that they were not going to get what they wanted from my sibling and family that I left behind and that they should come with me. They stated that was not the case and chose to stay where they were.



My mother recently had a birthday. My family skyped her and we had good time. In the past week she told my wife that none of my sisters, neices, nephews, cousins, her siblings, or anyone else wished her a happy birthday. That seems realy sad.



However, I did everything that I could to support my parents and my wifes parents. The reality of the situation is that you cannot save everyone. Especially your family. I have lived in my new location for seven months. I have only heard from any of my family if they needed something from me. There is nothing that I would have wish more for than them to need my help and they did not.



That is okay. I went to the new location and me and my family are living our lives to the best we can. I am sorry for the way things turned out for them but there is nothing I can do about it.



The bottom line is if you have done everything you can give up the guilt and remorse and get on with life. Make certine that what you think is happening is what is actually happening. Otherwise you will be sorry. Thanks.

Why wouldn't your family be close to you? My mom says she could never be able to live far away from me, and I honestly would never want her to be so far away either. She's my mother and my best friend so there's no one else I'd love to always keep closer to me than her. If I move somewhere, then you can be assured she will be living nearby. That doesn't mean I won't be having any privacy, but she will definitely be visiting every once in awhile and I will always welcome her with open arms as the great mother she is. Same goes to my dad and brother. I have no idea what it would be like to be far away from my family for so long but I'm sure it will take many years for that closeness and connection we have to fade away. I don't know how you can handle all this separation because for me, family is so important that separating myself that way is something I would never do.

It sounds like you have changed or rather grown as a person. That is the greatest thing we can do with the time we're given.

I would say that they will die anyway. So, what can you do about it? Nothing...

I can really relate. My family lives on the other side of the ocean from me. I haven't been back to my country in four years. I haven't seen my brother who lives in Australia since 2006! My mother and step-father were here this year because I gave birth to my second child so they came for a visit. I haven't seen my dad since 2008. Thankfully, my sister is coming for a visit on Monday. The older I get the more complicated it gets to get home--lately the problem has been money and airline tickets. I really do miss my family. It really teaches us to not take people for granted. Life is too short and unpredictable to do that.

******* stop your bellyaching ; at least you have a family....Geezzz of mighty..

I know how you feel. I live half a WORLD away from my family and I only get to see them every three years or so. It's hardest on the kids on both sides who miss their cousins so much.

You have family. Blood or not. They are there see them if you can or want. Love them if you can for love finds a way to make some kind of inner peace.

I myself have no family no inner peace. I have no love I am not mean I am a kind person.

Thank you for inviting me to this site it inspires me to search until the end.

Maybe the feelings are more intense because of the holidays.

You said it all, I experienced the same thing in the same situation every time I would go home.

Keep in touch and let them know you love them!

One of the most sad parts of life is when both parents die and there is no home to go back too

and it is especially felt around the holidays. My dad died years ago but my mother only 4 1/2

years ago and I took care of her as she died within 5 weeks time of panceratic cancer.

I read your post and I recognized the feeling you described... even though I have lived away from my home for just 3 years now, more than 1300 miles away from my home and family, and even i visit home several times a year, i miss them so much... Thank God for Internet;) I even force my poor near 60 years old mother to use Skype video calls...:))

Sometimes life takes us more far away.. brings us new people and new home... but our family is still always there and very very important and dear... so we must try to find chances to visit them, or invite them to visit us.. and keep in touch... to (video)call, to send little presents- flowers, candies etc.. to write..

I hope you will have good contact with your dear people and wont have to miss them!

best regards,

I blinked and he was gone,,,thats all i can think of about my dad,,,i had left home in a turmoil some years earlier,,,,i was 200 miles away in my new home,,,i didnt wanna be,,,but my step mum and i fought,,,she insisted i called her mum i said bugger off your not my mum i was 8yrs old when that

started i was 17 when i left,,,monthly i would cycle,,,yes cycle as in bycycle,, my way back to him,,,

honest,,,it was a ten hour trip down,,,ten hours back,,i would leave on friday eve early at 3pm ish and bike it throo the nite,,,,i did it for years,,then got married,,,he understood when i stopped that year,,,he died in the late summer,,,4yrs after i got married and stopped going down to see him,,,i never forgave myself,,,,,my parents had split when i was a small boy,,,i started going to see my mum in the car 300miles away,,,every summer monthly we would hitch the caravan on and go see my mum,,,,in 2006 i told mum that this summer we were locating the caravan at a resort,,we never saw her that summer,,,she died in the fall,,,,then a year later so did my younger brother of cancer

life went on,,,,i am lucky,,,i am fitter than the rest,,,,for some crazy reason i catch nothing,,have nothing,,,,just a long life to live and regret that i never made the effort when i could,,,,i worry now as i have an older sister who avoids contact with the survivors of our clan,,,when will it be her turn,,,,it starts eating at u,,,facebook cured that problem thankfully,,,,,we are diappearing one by one but the regrets are less,,,,,i wish i had gone to dad that summer tho,.,,if only to say goodbye,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

I blinked and he was gone,,,thats all i can think of about my dad,,,i had left home in a turmoil some years earlier,,,,i was 200 miles away in my new home,,,i didnt wanna be,,,but my step mum and i fought,,,she insisted i called her mum i said bugger off your not my mum i was 8yrs old when that

started i was 17 when i left,,,monthly i would cycle,,,yes cycle as in bycycle,, my way back to him,,,

honest,,,it was a ten hour trip down,,,ten hours back,,i would leave on friday eve early at 3pm ish and bike it throo the nite,,,,i did it for years,,then got married,,,he understood when i stopped that year,,,he died in the late summer,,,4yrs after i got married and stopped going down to see him,,,i never forgave myself,,,,,my parents had split when i was a small boy,,,i started going to see my mum in the car 300miles away,,,every summer monthly we would hitch the caravan on and go see my mum,,,,in 2006 i told mum that this summer we were locating the caravan at a resort,,we never saw her that summer,,,she died in the fall,,,,then a year later so did my younger brother of cancer

life went on,,,,i am lucky,,,i am fitter than the rest,,,,for some crazy reason i catch nothing,,have nothing,,,,just a long life to live and regret that i never made the effort when i could,,,,i worry now as i have an older sister who avoids contact with the survivors of our clan,,,when will it be her turn,,,,it starts eating at u,,,facebook cured that problem thankfully,,,,,we are diappearing one by one but the regrets are less,,,,,i wish i had gone to dad that summer tho,.,,if only to say goodbye,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

I know exactly how you feel... My family is out the country and I trully miss them now. I would never give so much value for this feeling if I would never left. I am here for you.

I was traveling, working, in the USAF, for 20 years. Home about 4 times on leave. Each visit was with

a different wife and family. Military life is hard on spouses.



Now, my three sisters are all available on Holidays, and the youngest sister lives 4 miles away!



As the eldest son, almost 65, and double retired, I find that I have time for 3 lovers, 12 great female friends, two mostly male clubs in computers and HAM Radio, so my life is now, at last, fully satisfied.

Hey, I am a 3rd tier Sagittarius, "Master". So, I am true to my natal horoscope!



My bratty sisters have matured into loving goddesses who affirm others, teach, and lead!

Never have I loved so well, nor, been loved so totally!