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I Realized Time Is Going So Fast.

I'm almost 34 years old.  I've lived nearly 1000 miles away from my immediate family for close to 12 years now.  I just got home from a one-week road trip to visit them.  Since I've gotten home, I've been really sad and even cried some.  I think the visit showed me just how much time has passed and how everyone is getting older.  I see my family several times a year, so I don't know exactly why I'm being affected so much by this visit.  I remember how my mom and grandmother would cry when we would have to say goodbye on visits when I was a kid.  I never understood how they felt until now.
azhix azhix 31-35 62 Responses Jun 28, 2010

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Sounds like you're maturing and love your family. You're alive! I've been through this and only live a few miles from parents. Whatever sadness you're experiencing, it's healthy and normal. Maybe its the tug you need to visit more often and likely they need you more than even they are willing to admit. I think it's normal to be the way you are and especially in these questionable times. Since 9/11, all of us are on barrowed time. Hang in there.

borrowed time? because of miles between? Hmm... Guess I should reneg my terms huh?

I would say 'visit more' and make the most of your beautiful family. I lived 2,000 miles away from my family and recently moved back because my dad got sick. Unfortunately, he died 3 months ago, and it was only then that I realised I had taken for granted the fact that he was simply in the same world as I was. Don't give yourself a chance for regrets, even if it's more phone calls and showing and appreciating the love between you. All the best

are there people around you whom you are related to by blood but you consider as family?

It's life, my dear...The life is passing by...and we can do NOTHING with this fact. Simply try to accept this fact... You can't change the situation, so accept. We all earlier or later will have to go away... Don't wait for this event. Simply LIVE!!! And enjoy every moment... You've got your family...It's wonderful!!<br />
They are alive..It's wonderful!!! They are waiting for your... what can be better??!!! A lot of people don't have that... You are lucky!!! Change your mind and BE HAPPY!!!<br />
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My hugs)))

I've experienced the same situation as you but I was 2000 miles away! I eventually moved back to within a 5-hour drive from family members. TODAY, we are all living within a 30-minute drive from each other. Time does matter. You must appreciate and relish every moment spent with family members. With today's technology it is much easier to stay in touch with everyone...however you still cannot beat that all important phone call where you hear your mothers voice...your dads voice or that of other members of your family. So, do stay in touch - it will be like you never left!

When I was just out of college, I had to move out in search of a job. When I was away, it was then that I realized the importance of family .I started feeling homesick. There were times when I wud just long for a tender touch of my mom by my side. When I was upset , I wished someone was there to listen to my grumbles, someone to share my joy with, someone to shout at. Someone to come back to home to after long day at work. I was fortunate enough to find a job in my own city after sometime. Since then I have never taken anybody in my family for granted. Its true life is passing by, but it is also true its upto us how we allow our lives to walk past by. So all the best ! keep smiling.

I know how you feel. Much of my family is close by to my own home, but I do have some family overseas in England and Scottland. I think the farther away your family is, the harder it is. I mean, I still love them, but appreciate them even more. Technology does help in staying in touch, but it's more important, I believe, to have regular family visits and reunions. It's a different feeling seeing them face to face then online or by phone. When it comes to love and family, time is of the essence.<br />
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As I write this, I think of my great uncle in England, and how much I love him and respect him for all the hardships and situations he has had to go through in his life. I just wish I could be there for him, be a part of it just like he is.<br />
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Nick

I had not seen my older brother since 1989 when I had a too short visit with him; he lived some 250 miles away and some of this time I had transportation problems and it wasn't easy to visit him. However I did stop by his town in 1995 in an attempt to visit him, but couldn't find him and nobody seemed to know him. I kept planning to see him in the near future. One day in 2002, my younger brother called to tell me that Tom had died suddenly. This was very sad news and I cried for 3 hours straight. All I can hope for is to get a chance to visit him in the next life. <br />
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Partly as a result, my wife and I stay very close together, very seldom are we apart, and we don't want to take the chance of being apart in case something were to happen to one of us.

I am with you...I live some 8000 miles away from my family and visit them once every year...the hardest thing is always saying good bye not knowing when I will see them again...the rest of the time I am just worried and feeling hopeless, then I realize how fast the time passes by and regret those seconds I could have spent making more memories....after all that is the most precious thing...just good memories.

just like you ive been away from my family for a long time..i can feel the pain but we have to face it that in order to make a better life we have to sacrifice...but you can do something before its gonna be late..in simple matter you can do like sending them some email telling how much you missed them that you love them so much...you have to let them feel the love in your hearth...dont waste the time that you can tell them that you love them..for me your so lucky cause you still have time to tell them that you love them and your there for them..me..i have no parents now both of them is taken by God and the only regrets on my side is i didint told them and i didint show them how important they are in my life..thats why as an advise dont waste the time..you have to show them how you love them before its gonna be late...always takecare and god bless...

Clearly I was meant to read this.<br />
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I just returned from a visit with my family, who live several states away, and we all got together for one day and celebrated both my niece's baptism and my 34th birthday yesterday. I have the "post-visit blues" today, and happened to (for once!) ready my Experience Project newsletter in my inbox, which featured your story.<br />
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Thanks for sharing. I am going to email my family expressing how much I enjoyed the visit, albeit a brief one, this weekend.

You Know, saying how you feel to your family when you do see them is always the hardest - I Love You to your Mom and Dad, brother or sister, sorry thats easy, just like enbracing them with a kiss. Say how you truely feel, thank them and above all be honest with the good and the bad. Clear your decks. It hasn't always been easy, I have a wonderful and honest relationship with my folks and sibblings. Something I have thought about when thay day comes - I'll never feel guilty for not saying how I feel or felt, nor will I feel guilty if I can't make it home in time. My folks know me and I them. I see them once 12 -24 months though we email and share fotos. Today I'm 14,000km away enjoying life's experiences (good and bad). I've lived from my family since 18,

I also live more than 1000 miles from home. I just realized I have seen my Mom only 12-13 times in 13 years. My nieces are grown up, My brothers older ..... I want to move back closer what (acidrefluxcures) posted inspired me to go ahead and move.

Hi. I've come to realise that life doesnt come with a replay button like a vhs tape machine or a dvd pla<x>yer. what if your mum or any one close to you died today. how would it make u feel knowing that you could have changed something but didnt?

Thanks for all the responses. It's nice to know others understand.

I know from experience how strong feelings of "loss" and separation can be. I took care of my mom and dad for over 20 years, eventually leaving work to care for a mother who was so much to me and the rest of the family. She crossed over 9 days before Christmas, in front of me as I tried to revive her. I have grieved for almost 3 years now but have found that no matter how distant we think we are from all our loved ones, whether here on Earth or in Eternity, spiritually connected we are all the time and in allowing yourself to wholly subscribe to that FACT, you will find that you are always connected, sometimes even more so. My dad is 91 now and lives 950 miles away from me. I miss him to and though I call him often, I too find myself missing him, the everyday things. <br />
Love those you have in your lives deeply and without reservations. Talk to them in you heart and if you do, pray for them. It helps to center your feelings. There is always a reason and a plan--oft said but not entirely believed in. We all go on our roads through life and the people we have, the people we meet, the people we lose (temporarily)--they are all treasures for our souls. Miss them but know they are always just a heart-felt thought away.<br />
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Best wishes to all my brothers and sisters, for truly we are all that and more. What a great voyage we are on, and will be on again.<br />
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mike

I feel the same....I moved 2 hour flight away from my mum, dad, grandparents, uncles and aunties my whole family really to be with my hubby who is from here. I can't tell you the post visiting blues, the crying every time I left them. I feel like I am just wishing the time away so I can see my fasmily again..It's horrible I should be happy and enjoying this time with my loving hubby but sometime I miss my family so much and phone calls and visits seem to make it worse I just get depressed and dont want to exersize, just want to eat rubbish and just want to cry constantly....I've been here 12 months now and its getting easier but im still not at that happy place yet...not sure if i ever will be untill im home again

your post stirred up my nostalgia,i was the one who tried to stay away from my famliy while choosing a college and while working,they were never caring or loving,there were always fights at home and all sorts of mini wars...Now karma is doing its job,now that i married and very very far away from them,i end up realizing you will always have your parents and siblings with you no matter what and how much you hate .i am havent visited them in 2.5yrs and alll i have in my life with real life is their online calls and calls i do to them.Visit them as often as you can...i get shocked whenever i see my mom and dad on cam...new wrinkles,more tiredness on their face and inspite of their sickness they manage to crack jokes and smile.....yes time moves so fast!!! Do more visits and try to bring them to your place and give them a vacation.thats all we can do...i havent been doing since my life is like crippled without a job and lot of other stuff.we have booked ticket s for home and i am excited.

I know how you feel and I live WITH my immediate family. When I come across people who tell me stuff like this, I feel sad for them and happy for myself. Our culture doesn't demand for me to move out when I became an adult.

i can say... give time for your loved ones.. because time will come.. and we cannot change our past nor plan our future so make time for your family bacause we can't tell the time.. and they're right don't waste your time for not so important.. because i have experience what you've been experiencing too, i may not that older as you and i am not saying your really an old, i just say it because i care.<br />
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so when the time would come, we can never feel regrets.<br />
stay good and healthy always (",)/')

I know how you feel when you are far away. Today with the computer you can use Skype to have nice video visits, no matter where you are. No its not the same as being there but a regular phone call does not have the same essence as a video call.

i understand i lost my family or what i cal my family the ones that reasied me from age 12 in a matter of hours on the same day so many years ago

reading this got me to think tht i spend less time with them. . . ive been away from home since the time i got to college till now that im starting looking for a job...i only see my family once or twice in a year.... this makes me sad because anytime soon..i know i wil be thousand miles away once i find a job..though now im used to it..it just makes me realized that i didnt spend enough time with my family.

Wow, I felt like I wrote that post...I currently live in Texas, and my family in Ohio. I moved here when I was 18, I just turned 30. I just recently start going home for frequent visits about 5yrs ago. The last visit, I took my future hubby and step son home to participate in my little sister's wedding. I am the oldest, and last to be wed...the last time I had been home was the year before for my brother's wedding...well, I had never brought home a guy before, so I was nervous. My parents were so loving and accepting and kept talking of us moving there. Part of me really wants to, because I feel I missed out on a lot with my brother and sister, and they are my world! I want to be Auntie for my nieces, and I'd love to be there, but the other part of me, the majority of me, loves it here in Texas, I'm living my life, and my mom tries to put these guilt trips on me hardcore, I know she's getting older, everyone is...aghhh...I just feel I should do what I want to do with my life...good luck to you, I hope you find what makes your heart the happiest!

I have been far from my family for the past six months and I think when I get back home I am not leaving them again!

Your story touched me because I just returned home from visiting my oldest son and his wife and my grandson. I only get to see them about twice a year and then only on his occasional weekend off that has to be scheduled in advance. He has a very demanding job but one that he says he would do for free if he didn't need the money. I enjoy my two year old grandson but there is never enough one on one time with my son to share our thoughts and concerns as well as our love. His cell is always ringing because someone at his company needs to do something or make future business decisions and his their director. I love the time I have with my son and his family. It is extremely important to me because my youngest son is estranged from me since his mother and I divorced 20 years ago. I have never met my two grandsons from his marriage and I haven't him call, send a card or come by in that same 20 years. Family is so very important to me and the loss of everyone is never forgotten. I am no longer a young man, but I am very proud of both of my sons and what they have accomplished in the short time that they have been grown. I am very glad I never divorced from a very unhappy marriage until after the first was 21 and the last was almost 19. Their lives are much more important than my was then or mine is now. Love each moment with your family and see them as often as possible because someday you won't be able to do so again in this world.

Time does seem to go by faster and faster as you get older. Follow your heart.

azhiz, Cheer up and reolve to be always there for your family. Surpirse them with a long unexpected phone call now and then. really interested in them. Let them alway feel reassured about you.

Dude join skype it might help

It's good that you love your family.