I Miss Him So Much

It's been 9 years but my relationship with him is still fresh in my mind. I'm married now for 3 years but still I cant forget my ex. I loved him so much and I believed that he felt the same about me. I knew my ex since when i was small we were very close and understand each other well.  I was also very close to his mother and loved her so much. The only reason we have to find our own way was because my mum didnt approve this relationship as she didnt like his family. I tried so many ways to tell her that I love him and I would really suffer if i separate from him. All my vail went into my mum's deaf ears.my mum could be very rude at times i didnt want her hurting him anymore or his mother.  At last we walked our separate ways. I've met my husband and got married 3 years back and my ex got married last year. I taught that I could forget him but then his memory hunts me everyday. It's been 9 years since we went our own ways. I still miss him alot. It's not that I dont love my husband but the feeling I have for my ex surpass everything. Thinking about him brings pain into every of my vain. I still do cry alot thinking about him and I have begin to hate my mum for what she has done. I met him last year few months after his wedding, I wanted to run to him and hug him and tell him how much I've missed him. But I know i cant do that now as he is married. I want him to be happy and I always pray for his happiness to GOD.
loveceeker loveceeker
31-35, F
5 Responses Nov 29, 2010

dear love2day, thanx for sharing your experince. I do understand your situation. Hope you are happy now. All the best to you. I also love my husband but the feeling i feel for him is not same as how i feel for my ex.

My situation is so much like yours. My dad didn't approve of my first love and i finally chose someone else to please my family. I have been married for 36 years and for alot of years he was emotionally and physically abusive, but for the past 8 years has been a very good husband, and i do love him. MY first love called me this past summer and opened all the feelings i thought I had locked away. I am now having an emotional affair with him, and we both feel the love of our youth. We don't plan on leaving our spouses or families, but I won't turn off My heart this time, for better or worse.

thanx for the support wilalwayswonder

Loveceeker...I know the exact feelings that you are feeling!! My first love will always have a totally different love than that of my husband or anyone else!! My husband does know I have feelings and will always have feelings for my first love! It did hurt him bad..but we have talked about it and worked everything out!! Our life together is wonderful..but there is always the thought of being with my first love again in my mind!!

Kaylor.. if you're pissed of please show your feelings to someone else dont hurt people who are already hurt. The reason to let go the relationship was taken mutual between both of us. I was only sharing my feeling. I didnt even mention here that I dont love my husband. <br />
You do not even know what when through at the moment. For your information I was adopted child so I felt gratitude towards my mum that was the reason I didnt want to disobey her. If you say that is weak let it be and I dont bother. You dont deserve to judge a person as u dont have humanity feelings at all. I'm more hurt after reading your reply. If you think you can say anything you like then you got the wrong forum. You forget to read this i guess at the end of your coloum " Experience Project is a community ba<x>sed on authenticity, support, and respect. "EP encourages you to post with these values in mind."<br />
You dont deserve to be here at all. please dont hurt anyone else. what goes around will come around bear that in your mind.