The First Wound

it started a year ago when he was with me in the school bus first i didn care but later on i started 2 like him but i kept on rejectin dat idea out of ma mind till ma sis happened 2 fall in his bro n they became an official couple i started 2 gather some infos from his bro ..yet didn know how 2 start talkin 2 him ..untill  day i got ma chance ..da girls in our sko0l spread a rumor dat he n ma sis r in luv while they never later dat afternoon ma sis told me 2 explain everythin 2 him n his bro ..n dats exactly what i did i started 2 talk 2 his bro 1st  then i talked 2 him ..da worst thing is dat i couldnt utter a meaningful sentence due 2 ma panic ..then we hung up n i thought dat still have no chance wid him..till a disaster happened n i found a girl dat kept on postin "their luv issue" everywhere so i aked his help n he said hewill try 2 manage ..n it finally started few mins later when we started 2 to know each other ..we chatted 4 hours n after a week i confessed2 him but unfortunately he said dat we got 2 have more time..3 weeks l8er we were talkin bout romance n i asked him 2 tell me da truth bout me as his bro told me dat he did like me unlike ma sis who said dat hes not mind was bout 2 explode out of confusion till he said dat hes bro was right n da 1st "iluv u" between us was came wid butterflies ..da next day ,happiest day of ma life, he askedme 2 b his gf ..our relationship was so passionate n full of romance n he was so understanding n appreciative ..he made me feel free 2 do whatever yet i never thought bout doin anythin without his cognition..i cant say   dat i luved him as da word luv was less dan what i felt 4 him ..he just popped up out of the blues nchanged ma life ..i was improving in everythin ma studies , ma relationships wid everyone ..i was brighter than ever..n i swear in every step i took ihe was on ma mind ..but da most amazing thing bout it dat he came at da time dat i needed him da most...n as katy perry said "b4 i met u i was a wreck" he came when i was losin hope in everythin in ma life...i was holdn on some sorta melted rope n was bout 2 fall on da ground when he came n held me saved me actually

by da end of da year sth changed but wasnt sure bout it he stopped answerin ma calls or goin online..i thought its just cuz of da exams as he started 2 go online afterwards...i noticed dat he stopped da romance n 3 months l8er he broke up wid me he said cuz hecant concentrate in his studies but l8er oni found out dat his 1st luv came back n dat tin when i asked him bout it he said she was his real luv n he never moved on ..n as he talked bout her ..i heard his tone n i could tell dat he was truly in luv ...but what rlly hurts dat i remembered maself talkin bout him in da same way 2 ma friends..n at the end she betrayed him..but i know he still has dat thing 4 her..n now what i h8 is dat he h8s da way i ask bout him dailyn founds it annoyin.. n wheneverhe is online he never speaks if i didn..though he used 2 start when we were 2gether...what kills me is dat i still luv him as 4 while its just da opposite 4 him n i think he wishes 2 get rid of me..n everytime i text him i hesitate cuz am terrified dat id annoy him n at da same i want 2 cuz i miss him badly ...i just h8 da way dat he used 2 tell me everythin while now he doesnt ..i h8 da way he is changed with me cuz i still imagine maself livin happily wid himtheni remember dat its all over n there comes da pain     
chocolateblazer chocolateblazer
18-21, F
May 5, 2012