And My Birthday Wish....

i've known my first, and truest, love since i was 3 years old. we met again when i was 15 and he 17. we share the same birthday, we have alot in common, but i am afraid i may be sadly, madly, mildly obsessed with him.


i cannot seem to let him go. i fantasize about him always. i miss him desprately and want to see him, kiss him , hold him just once more.but i know i want that once to be forever. It has been 11 years since i kissed his lips last and i can still feel them as though it were only yesterday.


but we are each married to others.


we still talk...i am very close to his family. i feel sometimes i will die if i can never be with him again. yet it seems impossible.

sometimes i feel i am insane for wanting him still...but then i remember how connected we are when we're together and i realize that maybe we will be happy together if not in this life then the next.at least i pray for that.


"if the sun refused to shine...i will still be loving you...mountains crumble to the sea...there will still be you and me"

gemini30 gemini30
31-35, F
4 Responses Jan 6, 2007

i loved your poem<br />
by the way it gave me hope

have you stolen my life,my love is a man and i am a man<br />
i meet him when i was a child<br />
i meet him again when i was 30<br />
it was predestined and we made that loving agreement<br />
he was beutiful i knew who he was<br />
but my life i am knowledgeble<br />
was rough and i am responsible for some of that<br />
i went threw a coma and was in the dark place<br />
a dark place like no other<br />
he has the abilty to read me<br />
he knew i was still not ready for him<br />
i meet him there and his father refused me<br />
i know thats 1 among a myraid of resons he ran away<br />
we were supose to be together i cant find him<br />
i have to love him <br />
and not be with him<br />
out of love for him<br />
i want him <br />
i need him<br />
but he will never love or trust me

look sweetheart you have to live this life like its th only life. even if tere is another you wont be able to touch or kiss! if you truely love him and he feels 100% the same way you have to do somehting about it. i know his other wife is in the equation but you cant be unhappy forever...<br />
<br />
xxx

Oh my gawd..you have touched my heart with your pain... I wish with all my heart that i could hold my love again like you..I dream...daydream...I know he does too...I am a single mum now but he is married with children & a bub on the way...I cant talk to him anymore...I too wish for the next life.. I dont want to meet when we are old and grey only to say to each other...Why didnt we do something sooner....STOP Punnishing yourselfs..there are no camera's..this isnt some tragic love movie..this is real...Trust your hearts & your souls..have you ever thought that this is the next life from the last one ?? That this is your chance ??