How Army Boys Break Your Heart

Some may slap a lable on love stating that you have to be 'a certain age' or having conquered years of knowledge to actually know what love is. However, these people are severely mistaken. I am eighteen years old, and I have loved.

Anyone at any age can be in love. A seven year old can love their sandbox play mate. A twelve year old and love the boy across the class in home room. True, they aren't probably going to be the strong love that holds together marriages and spend the rest of your lives in devotion to one another, but it still means something.

I met a boy when i was 14 years old at a halloween party. I sort of found him repulsive at the time. You see, I was a decently snobby girl, this boy was a tad to open and annoying for my taste. We started talking online, and i ended up discovering a crush on the boy. I asked him out on new years eve. Yes, I asked him. I don't feel like guys have to  dominate women. It's not my style.

Well, we finished off our ninth grade year at different schools, then i ended up moving into his school district the following year. We dated all throughout highschool.  Some thought this was idiotic in the fact that we were hindering ourselves for discovering what we really wanted in a relationship. What those people didn't realize was that I had already found that.

I knew everything about this boy. Although, their might have been a few things I wasn't exactly proud of, You make sacrifices for one another. I never had to give up anything that would rip my heart out for not having it anymore, and he definitely leaned my way more than once.

We were amazing people together. Yet, like most relationships these days, we hit a few ruts. We usually got over them. You see, my love was joining the Army. At first, i was disgusted by the idea. I'm a pretty civil person and I don't believe in war. I guess call me a hippie without the drugs. I understand that people need to fight for our freedom, but why my guy?

This caused major arguements, but i finally realized it was what he wanted to do, and i couldn't stop him. Towards the last month we were together, things just kept getting worse and worse. We seemed to be fighting over absolutely everything. We were both fed up with it. So, we decided to take a break.

I'm going to be litteral. MOST STUIPD IDEA EVER. We sort of drifted. I saw him every now and then. We went out to dinner with his family the day before he left, which was this morning at 4am.

Saying goodbye to him was the hardest thing i've ever done in my life. He kept telling me there was no need for goodbye. He'll be back and he's going to write me every week.

I still love this boy with all my heart. I'll miss him everyday untill he comes home. As much as I've hoped that when he comes home that we could work things out, I'm almost against it as well. I think we grew up together. We helped eachother make important life lessons that define us as individuals.  I think that was our purpose in eachothers lives. Now it's time to move on. Yes, that is going to take what feels like an eternity, but it's true.

I will always love him. Nothing can change that. I really do miss my first true love.

stellar stellar
18-21, F
5 Responses Jul 11, 2007

thanks. i do know he is doing it for his country and to make himself a better person. yet, hearing it from you helps. thanks a lot for sharing.

Sounds almost exactly like my story. Me and her have drifted after we were separated this summer. I love her with all my heart. The only difference between us is that I'm the boy who became a soldier.<br />
I can't say exactly what's going on in your love's mind, but this is what's on my mind. I want to protect my country, so I enrolled into the military. I love her very much. My choice to stay in the military doesn't mean I don't love her, in fact I love her more than anything, and being a soldier is breaking my heart, and I'm miserable.<br />
What I'm hinting at is that the boy probably didn't choose the Army over you, it's just something soldiers have to do no matter what. Just so you know.

my first love experience is like yours, minus the army part. we met in freshman year, and i didnt like him at first. he was a stoner and he wasnt all that attractive, but despite that i got to know him and grew an attraction to him very quickly. we were never officially together, and we still go to school together, but it is still really difficult to cope with not seeing him and talking to him everyday. he was my best friend and although we never said it (he asked me out a few times but i never really said yes or no), we did have a relationship as more. i still miss him, everyday.

I agree, it is annyoing when you are told you don't know what love is. It's differnt things to differnt people. Just because you are young, doesn't mean you don't know what love is. I still remember my kindergarten sweetheart, I just jokinly refer to him as that. I was only 5, so it wasn't a deep love. But he was my first best friend, and I still have memories of him. I wonder if he remembers me.<br />
I understand being conflicted about whether to move on or not, I was in that situation with my ex(not the kindergarten boy, lol, someone else) and it is a sticky situation to be in. I finally realized I had to move on and let go. Maybe still be friends with him, and see how that goes. That might help you better decide what to do.

I suggest you call him/leave him a message anything, and tell him that no matter where you are you'll always love him. Certainly if you haven't already done. You'll meet other people, but at least if he knows he might come back to you one day otherwise he might well feel the same way about you and never try again because he believes you've moved on.