I Just Miss My Friend

I really don't miss him per se. I really just miss my friend. After things didn't work out they way I wanted them too, we remained friends. Our friendship was important to us. But ever since he got a girlfriend, he's pretty much disappeared on me, with the exceptions of a few e-mails here and there. The whole relationship its self was extremely complicated too complicated to explain almost. One thing being it was long distance.  But I didn't let that bother me, but I think he let that get in the way. And there are still many complications. Now the main thing is I just want my friend back. :( I don't let many people in, I was able to let him in.  Even after things didn't work we still talked on a regular basis, then his gf enters the picture, and then overnight basically, I go to barley talking to him. :(

Lately, I have found my self a bit nostalgic for some reason with memories. Even though, I really don't want him back.  But blasting Kelly Clarkson music seems to help me feel better and remind me although he was a nice guy he really can be a jerk at times. :) A bit of topic here: I love her music, so many songs I can relate to, they are so me.

update (10/19): ok, so I guess I am having a really off week, because I am missing him again! Again more in the I want my friend back way. I haven't heard from him in a good while, and for the most part have been fine with that, well maybe more gotten use to it to the point where it didn't bother me as much.  Now I miss him again. :( I even tried calling him, but chickened out and hung up after the first ring. And the last couple days, everything has reminded me of him! Like last night I watching a show I like to watch, and one of the guest starts characters name had his name.  I don't know what it is, and why all of a sudden I am missing him again.
littleroo littleroo
26-30, F
3 Responses Jul 25, 2007

I wrote that story over the summer, and since then we have got back in touch and pretty much have become best friends again(I think you know the story there) I am glad we are friends again. It was incredibly hard not talking to him, but in some ways I think it helped, maybe I just needed space from him. Maybe do distance yourself from him and when and if your ready be friends with him, but if you don't reach the point of wanting to be friends that's fine too. Do what ever works for you.

~hugs ya~ Girl.... I feel you and understand you on so many levels right now... I miss his friendship, I miss being able to talk to him and find out stuff about him, but I made things a bit awkward for me and him that now it's hard for me to ask anythhing of him. I wish I was strong enough to take his friendship proposal. Maybe then I would still had more of a bit in his life than I have now... It's wierd, maybe it will progress. Yesterday we finally sort of talked but on a professional level. Me as his boss maybe cause I run the tutoring group he's involved with... I miss him but I'm trying not to let my emotions get in the way cause I know I still got feelings for him somewhere in my hidden thoughts and ways... But shux thanks for sharing your experience.

Hey there... I'm new on this site, but I just wanted you to know that I feel like I can totally relate to what you're going through. Especially the part about being naturally kind of introverted and careful about letting people in. When my ex and I broke up, it was basically because of circumstances, specifically college. We both knew expecting long distance to work out would be naive. After a month of texting and daily emails, most of which are pleasant and definitely something I look forward to in order to still feel the connection to him, now we've come to a stall in our friendship...basically I've gotten a bit defensive and I think my last email was too harsh... because I read too much into his responses and I feel like I'm watching the actual process where I get replaced by some other girl that he's getting to know at his school. yeah, i feel like i've been neglected, big time. i remember all the times he used to apologize whenever there was the possibility of me being hurt by something he said or did, and of course all the sweet heartwarming things that seemed to be so sincere. I'm sorry, lol, this comment turned out much longer than I meant for it to be, but it's nice to get it out. I check my email like twenty times a day to see how long he can hold out not talking to me...so far it's been disappointing. =( well, i've definitey been jamming to different songs, cuz yeah, some of the lyrics definitely fit.<br />
Hope we both get through this tough stage right now...and hope we can stop being melancholy very very soon! Cheers, xinspiration.