Wish She Had Never Left...

Last year in the summer i had started dateing my best friend. i loved her so much. She gave me my 1st kiss... she was the 1st girl i ever said "i love you too" and things were great... i was so happy... But one day... around this time last year we were talking on the phone. She had told me that she had feelings for one of her friends. Me being me i got concerned... so i kinda fliped out a little. not extream but i wanted to know exactly what was goin on yea know? well we started argueing and i had told her that i had feelings for one of my other friends and i threw away that friendship just for her... and she told me that she was greatfull but she could not do the same for me... that night she told me not to talk to her for 2 days while she made a decision and hung up on me. I knew what was going to happin, i sat in my room all night just stareing at the walls. The next day i went to school and she was avoiding me. I found her and she left me. The next day she was all smiles and i was basicly dead to the world. Because i couldnt be happy for her and her new boyfriend i lost alot of friends... How could i be happy about that? honestly? people kept saying things like "why do you hate her new boyfriend? what did he ever do to you? he is a nice guy!"... so yeah i was made to be the bad guy here when i did nothing wrong. She didnt even have an excuse for leaving me. about 3 months ago before i had stopped taking to her i told her that i still had feelings for her... i spewed my heart out to her in hopes she would return but instead she said very coldly "It is to late for that..." i dont talk to her anymore but i still love and miss her so very much... the reason why i just stopped talking to her is because i didnt want to apear creapy or be that "Phyco ex boyfriend"... now i just feel empty and all i can think about is her. I am to affraid to move on and find another becasue i feel that this will just happin again. I just wish i could stop thinking about her, that would realy make this alot easier for me.

Krie Krie
2 Responses Mar 27, 2009

It was thoughtless of your friends to expect you to accept your ex's new boyfriend. Who would in your situation? I remember watching my boyfriend, my only love smooching with his new girlfriend the night he met her, right in front of me. I screamed down his ear but he ignored me. You will understand my crazed anger. Not talking to your ex. is your way of coping, of trying to accept what is unacceptable to you. You are human, for goodness sake! It is still early days, things will get better. *Hugs*.

Don't let that girl ruin your life. If you can't be together, think of all the bad stuff about her & start REALLY looking for a different girl.<br />
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Time has its place in healing a broken heart. but don't think you need to end your amazing, beautiful life because of a relationship that didn't work out. get involved in other stuff & just hope that you meet someone better for you in the process.