I Miss My Sister

You know its been 7 years since I lost my big sister, but sometimes it feels like it just happened. I can often openly talk about her, the way she could sing any song beautifully, the way her back was covered in unfinished tattoos, the way she always died her hair or how she loved mosh pits and punk misfits. She was weird in the greatest way possible. I feel so honored that i had her as my sister and i love to share stories of how she raised me like her own daughter. But other days, i just want to break down and cry. I think of the same things but i feel nothing but pain. I dont understand why she isn here. I try to live by the saying everything happens for a reason but i just cant possibly imagine what that reason is. Sometimes i feel nothing but anger. My sister died of a drug overdose and i cant help but think it could have been prevented. She did it to herself and i just want to scream at the thought of no one helping her or her helping herself. Some days i just wake up and the first and only thing i want to do is tell her how much i miss and love her. How much she means to me. Because she never really got to hear it from me, i was only seven. Now i want to show her how i have grown. Im told im just like her. I just hope shes proud of the person i have become. I love you, Melanie.
maristyler9 maristyler9
13-15, F
May 13, 2012