I'm Counting The Days.

This is going to be a long one, but for those who want to skip the obnoxiously long book I'm about to write then it boils down to this: There is nothing in this world that would stop me from doing whatever I can to make this man happy, if he chooses to be with me forever or not. The amount of respect and pride I have for him is nothing compared to what he's doing everyday, where he has been in life, how I'll never go through anything that hard, where he'll go in life, and just how wonderful and genuinely loving and supportive this man is to me.

In my life, I've learned to be an ice queen. Not out of spite, but out of genuine respect for myself. You have to be an outstanding person to impress me. Never in my life have I been so instantly connected and attracted to someone. I can't say this is a case of 'love at first sight' but I now know how that term could have come about. A good girlfriend of mine had wanted to go out one evening. I was hesitant but also needed to pull away from my own hectic life that is my current living situation. -A pretty fresh divorce of my biological parents had me move back in with my mother to keep an eye on her stability. Last year my mother met my new 'stepfather' who is a great man and loves my mother very much, and right before I met my soldier, we found out my stepfather has small cell cancer. Life is cruel. - That evening we pulled into a common watering hole. One we don't go to often at all. We had rootbeers (Yes at a divebar, it was one of those nights) and played darts and not much of anything else until one of our mutual guy friends came along and caught our eye. He was there with a few other good friends of ours and another man I had never seen. Noticing he hasn't introduced himself after we're all having a good time, I stick my hand out and say, "Well since our friends aren't going to introduce us, my name is _____" Instantly we hit it off. He literally had me after he noticed the background on my phone's screen and made a joke about how I already had his modeling picture. He also told me he worked for the 'government' to which I informed him people who cut grass in parks also work for the government. The laughs and common interests went on and on until my girlfriend was ready to go home. Much earlier now than I would have liked. I have never left a stranger feeling so disappointed that I couldn't learn more about him. The next evening I get a call from another girlfriend who would also like to hang out. Ended up at the same bar, but not before telling her like a school girl how I had met an incredible guy, but he would be leaving again soon and how disappointed I was. My behavior shocked her as I am the type to be skeptical and unmoved by any advances so she encouraged me to call him. to my delight he practically stopped what he was doing to meet us. I tried my best to keep my cool for all of 20 minutes when he walked through the door but we were so locked on each other for the rest of the evening that it felt like we were the only two there. I was in mid sentence when he got this debating look on his face, clearly said ',Should I? Yes I should and will.' in his mind, and kissed me with both hands on either side of my face. The very best kiss ever, for the entire bar to see. Normally I would've backhanded such a bold move but I was totally under his spell, and after trying to process the information asked him if he's like to step outside. I got all of a nod before he took my hand, ran out the bar and had each other up against a wall kissing with more passion I've ever seen or heard of. And this continued.....Just fervently kissing ..........and saying how amazing the other was ....... until 5:30 in the morning.

Skipping to the end of the best, most fulfilling, this would be another four pages and a half alone if I had to put it into words, week of my life. The night he's leaving there's a party for his departure, and our close friends birthday.(Held conveniently right down the road from my girlfriend's house) Both of us have not said anything along like, 'we're dating' or how crazy we are about each other to anyone but best friends. The people who matter to us know, the rest of the world can kiss it. The party is dying down, A drunk friend's girlfriend pipes up and says, "So I hear you and ___ are an item now?" I reply shyly that, yes, this is true.( We were both are hesitant of making this public so early on. We both want to know 200% that neither of us turns out to be kitten killers in secret.) The group sitting with us congratulates me and tells me just how great of a guy he is and how nice of a match we'd make. Then she vocalizes her opinion once more and loudly proclaims, as my hot stud in uniform walks through the door, "Well I think it's the stupidest thing I've heard. I wouldn't wait around for someone I just met blah blah blah." I didn't fight anything she said. I just replied that she has the right to formulate her own views and so do I. I wasn't the one bothered, everyone else fussed at her. I already knew that for the first time in my life this was the one clear thing I wanted. However, My soldier had taken an exit almost as quickly as I tried to escape the conversation. I went to cool down out back. Calm on the outside, ready to cut someone on the inside. Chatting with people, I overhear my soldier and the girls boyfriend fussing in the front yard. The boyfriend apologizing. My soldier fussing about how he thought I was the one upset, and how not once did he ask for me to choose to stay with him because he knows how hard it is.(Little does he know just how worth the wait a tiny half a year is if I can have him all to myself when he comes home) Not one to eavesdrop, I walk up as quickly as possible. Tell our guyfriend not to worry and that his girlfriend is simply drunk and ask my soldier if he'd like to walk me to my truck. As soon as we are out of ear shot, I reassure him that no one has influence on how I feel or what I think as we made our way to the vehicle. From the first time I met him I swore I wouldn't cry, but knowing he'll be leaving for the airport in an hour and he'd thought we'd been shaken when we were so fresh into this wonderful thing pissed me off to the point I could hardly contain my tears. I did not sob, I did not whine like I child, but yes a few escaped me and he clearly saw them, and everything he said next didn't help. I've never seen a soldier cry, still haven't, and I don't want to. Not my soldier, not if I had anything to do with it. I let him know exactly what he meant to me, and he told me everything that was on his mind and in his heart too. It was so hard to tear ourselves away. He jogged to the house so he wouldn't look back, and I watched in the mirror and THEN let it out.

He's almost home now, and never could I have imagined a greater, healthier foundation than the one we share. Every morning he has an internet connection, he tells me he loves me and how beautiful I am even if I'm sleeping. The days he doesn't he walks however far he has to just to call so we can hear each others voices. I send him care packages to the point he says he's others are envious.(Which makes me sad for them more than anything) I take his knife everywhere with me, he carries my most treasured possession in his pocket. Every chance I get I tell him how thankful and proud I am just to know him, and jokingly how I should buy lotto tickets. Every night we skype. every day he might have off we play a video game or whatever we can. Never in my life did I ever think a person could not become dull in some way. I've never thought romance was anything but cheesy until now. I guess it takes the right man to keep it manly. He has become a true and genuine best friend I can count on. Even our parents like the other. I used to think love was simply a chemical reaction that faded after the honeymoon stage was over. We both know we are in this together and that successful relationships are hard work but if this is where the hard work begins, I am the luckiest woman on earth. I'm bettering myself, for myself and so he can have the very best. Not because he's ever asked, but because I want to be a better person for him. He thinks I hung the moon and stars, I think he's a living dream. I would do anything for my soldier.

I miss him terrible but I am so blessed that I can talk to him so freely. I'm so heartbroken thinking of those of you who can't. You are all so strong. You are all this newbies inspiration.
imakeadapasta imakeadapasta
22-25, F
1 Response May 21, 2012

Awee... your story is sooo insperational, and it touched my heart sooo much.I am sooo glad you are soo happy with him that really helps with a long distance relationship. I also make sure my soldier knows how proud I am of him, I would like to send him more care packages but it's sooo expensive, I also dont have a job at the moment because I only have two more months of school left YAY!! My soldier will not be back home till sometime next year I have a long way to go. Well I wish you the best of luck and hang in there and if you need anything I am here for you. :)