Just Having One of Those Days

Normally, I'm the one whose always the "strong one" in many situations; but since my ARMY Man has been deployed to Afghanistan, I feel that I've been on an endless emotional rollercoaster.

The last two days, I feel that I have been at my strongest; and I know I needed to be .....especially for him because he's been having it really hard the last couple of days. But today, I woke up and looked around -and though it is such a beautiful day outside, I can't help but to feel so helpless, lonely, and pissed! -And it just HURTS! I just miss him so much right now and nothing else matters. It is so beautiful outside, and I just wished that he could be here (if only for an hour) just to sit out in the sun with me on the porch for a while. I know that in a couple of hours or so I'll regain "my inner strength"once more; but at this time I just feel the need to "break".

I just thank God that I've come across this site and was introduced to many women just like myself. Though this is not his first deployment, it's my first deployment with him. I know I'll need you guys to help me get through this as he's only been gone for one month now; which means "this rollercoaster" thing is going to become the norm for a while.....so, I guess I'm going to need to learn how to ride it out!

I know things will get better for me, but now....-JUST HAVING ONE OF THOSE DAYS!!

 

TheWomanHezCrazyAbout TheWomanHezCrazyAbout
36-40
3 Responses Feb 22, 2009

Kudos Squadiwife! I agree!! I have let myself become weak and have stayed in bed and cried all day! It's what we have to do, let it all out, this is what picks us back up and makes us STRONGER! We are here for you girl!

Thanks Squadiwife!! I feel ya....LOL

Everyone of is entitled to as many of those days as needed while our men are away. We can hold strong for them and still have a bad day. i'm sorry but we are human and have needs. A need to be held cared for and loved and when the one person in our lifes leaveS and we are left with an empty heart and not knowing what can happen. So its ok to have a bad day or cry or sit in your p.j's all day and do nothing. Just try not to make a habbit of it. Lol It will all be ok and I am glad your here. So all of us can get through this togehter.x