I Just Don't Know Why

I just don't know why I still cry at that song. You were mean to me and more than half the time gone.

You made me cry and you made me feel alive. Thank you for coming into my life and creating that strife.

Without that pain, I wouldn't know happiness again.

I sit alone in my car each day. I think about how you didn't ever want to play.

You were a drain and I loved you without end.

You made me insane and now I don't know where to begin.

The new beginning has come, because I don't phone you.

I feel really dumb, because I didn't "own" you.

I thought I was yours and you were mine.

When you weren't serious the whole time.

The words you said, never quite fit in my head.

I have actually wished I was dead, because we are not laying in our bed.

Your anger lashed out, and you told me don't doubt.

I thought our love was real, I now know it was like a pill.

You took my pain away for awhile, if with only a touch or a smile.

The wound is deep, for us being such a short time.

The pain doesn't sleep, so I'm trying to rythme.

You rarely showed me, only told me how you feel.

Those actions alone are real.

It's what lets me know that I have already begun to heal.

Or would I take you back...

It wouldn't be the same

with all the knowledge I have gained.

We've been apart and I haven't seen your angel face. You are in a whole other place. 

 May you please stay there and be strong, because you are not for me, I know we were wrong.

You treated me horribly and I loved you the same.

I should've never even played that game.

Stupid was I, to hold you up so high.

On a pedestal is where I put you, and look at all the trouble you put me through.

We are done, I'll say it over and over until I know.

I wanted to have you a son, we were gonna watch him grow.

Wait, were done, I can't do that anymore.

Dream of the things that are no more, along with me those visions walked out the door.

 

Deneece1979 Deneece1979
26-30, F
Mar 1, 2010