I miss him, that capricious little f~cker. He was definitely dangerous for me, with the way he would shift moods so quickly. Too quickly. I could never keep up. I got afraid. Would he be my best friend today, or would he ditch me in favor of the pretty girls? I never wanted anything more than friendship, and he knew that, because he was the first one (the only one) I confided my sexuality to. I told him everything- when my mom started dating a drug dealer (a story for another time), I told him. He would make me CDs and I would have to pretend that I liked his band. I was such a good faker.

When I called him, he didn't answer. Texts were never replied, and in the off chance that he acknowledged my presence, it would be a brief 'busy ttyl'. Only we never talked later.

So f~ck him. I miss him, but f~ck him.
QueenOfLosers QueenOfLosers
16-17, F
Aug 19, 2014