I Have Bovilexia

I am not a severe bovilexic... but I sometimes do get the "uncontrollable urge" that everyone talks about. And I just have to lean out the car window and moo at the cows. My husband on the other hand... he's so bovilexic that he has a shirt about it. Can't pass a cow without mooing at it. It's horrifying what this disease has done to him. Thank God I don't have such severe symptoms.

Bovilexia often has innocent beginnings- on a road trip, passing by fields of cows, children think that perhaps if they moo at them, the cows will hear their greeting from the outside world. As childhood fades and these often unrealized hopes dwindle, the mooing doesn't stop. The sufferer often succumbs to the disease so fully that s/he can often be sighted sticking his/her entire torso out the car window and screaming "MOO!" at the top of their lungs... sometimes for only one cow, hundreds of feet away. This disease is dangerous. Ranchers who get it often lose their livelihood because of their inability to stop mooing at their own cows. Drivers with bovilexia get into accidents because of their uncontrolled distraction. And teenagers who unsuspectingly take their bovilexia-stricken friends cow-tipping are sometimes lost in stampedes.

You can help stop the spread of bovilexia. If you have children, stop them from mooing at cows on road trips by putting blinders on the windows of your car. If you think you have a child, friend or relative with bovilexia, do your best to move them to England or New Zealand (research has found that the contraction of caprilexia, a related but much less severe disease involving "baa"ing at sheep, can reduce the effects of bovilexia). We must all look out for our loved ones if we're to slow this epidemic.

*sees a cow* ....MOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

Christabel Christabel
18-21, F
11 Responses Aug 15, 2007

I moo even if a cow isn't there just randomly because I'm bored

Sadly, there aren't as many old VW bugs left on the road... so my daughter and I whilst on a road trip reinvented the game of punch-buggy...<br />
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On a trip through North Carolina, we nearly wore each other out with punches and giggles each time either of us spotted the replacement in our updated game...<br />
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"Punch-Heifer!" one of us would scream, then deliver a punishing blow....<br />
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...Wow i thought i just moo at some cows cause it's something to do, but now i think i maybe Bovilexia (and possibly my friends have it to), but i also don't "moo" at every cow so i may just be bored when i to that. IDK ^ ^

Being in England doesn't help. Both my wife and I baa at sheep as well. Getting older does not help the condition!

O.o<br />
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I didn't think stuff like this could even happen! I mean, the urge to moo? That's so random!<br />
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None the less, it's very interesting. And I'll know what to do if someone I know starts to moo alot.

Ah, finally, a proper name for the condition! I shall tell my other half immediately. He moos all the time now, doesn't even realise he's doing it (you know, the way some people hum abstractedly, he'll say "moo").

LOL. I am a bovilexic. Terrible affliction, I often eat at this Dairy Queen, moo at the concrete cow AND take it's picture.......I just can't stop myself.....I even moo with just a bowl of ice cream......

Hmm, well maybe Siberia would be better then. Not much of anything there.

I'm afraid moving to England may not help this condition. Being from the UK myself, I know of many people who suffer from this uncontrollable moo-ing, as do I, and the suggestion that the contraction of caprilexia may ease the bovilexia is not that helpful, as these two conditions seem to come hand in hand around here.

lol... that's another approach :)

OMG! Too funny! Can you imagine if you had Terret's Syndrome AND Bovilexia??!! : Moo F***in' MOO!!! Heheheehehee