Mother In Law Problems Please Help Me!!!!

it all started about a year and a half ago when i first met my husband! the first 6 weeks of our relationship was good then i meet his mother for the first time and all she could tell me was nasty things about his dad and what he use to do to his son ..the problem is i have been good friends with my husband dad for 8 years before i met his mum and my husband!!! then i lost my dad a few wks later and i went into shock i had a lot of guilty feelings which i now know i shouldnt of had but it took months to understand this i got that depressed i went down to 7 stone and i was rushed into hospital a few times which they said i was heading for a nervous break down!! all through last year my husband mother knowing wht ive been going through just wouldnt stop slaggging of people to me like her own daughter or her x husband she even told me that she was going to sleep with her x just to split up her xs marriage but the problem is im best friends with her xs new wife and have been for 14 years!!! anyway it all came to a crunch when i put a stop to it and told her and my husband ive had enough of her slagging down everyone to me its out off order and i didnt want to speak to her unless she had something nice to say but in the mean time my husband sister is still hanging around with his x which who treated me really badly and she knows this!!! we asked her to stop hanging around with her but she lied and said she only saw her once in a while which she was seeing her every week infact my husband sister was his xs birthing parnter she doesnt see a problem with it that she is hurting her brother and me!!! anyway now i have cut off from them i get the blame from my husband its my fault but i didnt start it so how can it be the only thing i have said to my husband about this is that your mother says evil things about people and her own family and that his sister is a liar and he says im slagging em down which i dont we were going to get married on concorde but they put a stop to that aswell by throwing paddies cause i wasnt going to have his sister kids as my brides maids just wanted my two granddaughters as we couldnt afford it but to be honest with you all why should i have them as my bridesmaids his sister couldnt even be bothered to come to see the venue with me i did try and get her involed but she kept blowing me out for my husband x ...then his mother stopped talking to me i tried to explain wht his sister was doing but it wasnt good enough so in the end i cancalled it was due to money aswell as what his sister was in the end we decided to go and get married with know one there when i told my family after we got married they wer so understanding even tho they where upset they said as long as im happy they are happy...but since then his mother keeps saying to him youve really hurt me cant belive you could go and do such a thing she really trys and makes him feel guilty about it...but the other week i had to open my mouth and say your mothers upset... ive got a dying 20 year old who is dying andand wasnt there at our wedding but he doesnt make me or us feel guilty everybody else brought us a wedding card except his mum and sister what is there problem? since then his mother is and it is still on going that ive been on fb and deleted things she has put on there... that i never give him a message if she rings the house phone which i always do!!! she lies and tells him things i havent said....she even has ago at him cause he doesnt reply faster enough on fb..another things april the 22nd this year was the first aniversy the day i buried my dad and she had arrange for him to go see her on the isle of wight i told him to go and he did leave but came back two hrs later saying i cant leave you on a day like this...but she has made his life hell because of it she even turned around to her x and said if it wasnt for her he wouldnt off come HER im not a her i do have a name...then last weekend we went out for the day and cause she couldnt get hold off him she phoned up her x ranting and raving say thing like his burning all his bridges with me what sort of mother says that ? it just goes on and on please what can i do please help me :) x
traceymny traceymny
May 14, 2012