How Do I Get My Hoh To Be More Severe In My Punishment?

We have been in the D/D relationship for almost a year. He does spank me. He uses a belt most of the time. On a few occasons he uses a huge piece of rubber that goes on cars. That thing HURTS. He can hit me with the belt 50X and it does not hurt as bad as 10 with the strap. The last 2 spankigs have actually been quite hard however with the belt. However, I have never cried. I have asked him on a few occations when I knew that I was going to get punished if he would punish me until I cry, then at that point get the strap and give me a dozen more then, with his hand until I can't even cry anymore. Not to listen to my pleas for him to stop, but to continue the punishment to the end. I feel that I need a severe punishment right now. I don't think I would need that severe everytime but I believe that every once in a while would be a great reminder for me to be a better person and have a better attitude. I have explained that when he sees the attitude that I do not like having it either. Sometimes I am just stressed and need a release. I need a GOOD oldfashioned whipping. He just does not think that he can bring that kind of pain to me. He does not understand that the pain I feel when we fight is a lot worse than any whipping he could ever give me, and not nearly as effective.
Any suggestions on how to make him understand that this is what I need and it would benefit our relationship??
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4 Responses May 21, 2012

Perhaps it's time for you two to visit a true Dominator (professional) & learn some new tricks. My King went by himself & just learned a few things and I had no idea what I was in for until I stepped out of line one night at dinner. ;)

Perhaps what you need is a different type of pain. Something you and your hubby might want to try: <br />
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I agree with Oneiroi, I like mutual submission and yes it can be accomplished. In my situation we have worked it out to where the means have to justify the ends. In other words we both have to work to get what we want. Agreed sex denial is the greatest, if he is dominate enough and doesn't give me the level of pain/pleasure ect that I need or vice versa then we hold out until it gets done and that makes the ****** 1000 times more intense.

I think you hit....(no pun intended ;)....) on exactly the feelings that alot of spanking enthusiasts feel at the core. I would rather get that punishment, or corner time than fight or have negative words between my Dom and I--I also know that it's about a release and attitude adjustment (at times). I know it would be a little...okay, ALOT of what is called "topping from the bottom"....but you could bring him the belt, or whatever toy you think you might need and present it to him and ask him nicely. That's one way to signal him of times that you might need that--the other thing is to tell him what you've hurts you MORE when the two of you fight than when this is done. I like it because there is a little something called aftercare....that makes me feel like the whole wrong-doing has been erased. But be careful with pushing him...the fact that he is doing this, is HUGE. Alot of partners would not be so open to trying it or doing it if it is preferred by their partner rather than what they prefer. Let him know that you appreciate it....rub his feet or give him a massage to let him know you appreciate what he does for you. :) good luck