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My Husband Doesn't Love Me

I am gonna turn 30 in may have been married for 6 years and i 2 kids. I went out with my husband for 6 years before marrying him. I have given him everything, the best part pf my life i gave him but now i feel like he doesn't care anymore. I feel suffocated in this relationship now. their was a time where he woudn't go to work without giving me kiss and a hug and now he doesn't like the sound of my voice. I feel so lonely i can't share this with him everytime i do he tells me to leave him. Can anyone relate to me , he is such a good dad to our kids they adore him. He talks to me infront of family and friends, he makes out what a good husband he is but when it's just me and he doesn't want to know me. we don't have sex anymore everytime i do approach him he turns away. i cry myself to sleep now and he doesn't care i don't know what to do please anyone help me xxx
zarda12 zarda12 26-30, F 5 Responses Mar 24, 2012

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You are not alone. My husband comes home from work wants to talk about whatever he wants to talk about & plays with our daughter. Minimal conversation with me if he can avoid it.... Turns on the tv then says can't you see I want to relax? Hello I work too....Any intimacy in our marriage is totally gone he avoids it. He has had issues in the past with performance & we've gone to counseling for it, he doesn't work on staying in shape or our marriage. His only interest are sports, work & our daughter. Our marriage & my needs are way at the bottom. I tell him what I need but he just says you? Like I'm doing this to him. He always feels like he is one who is being treated bad by me. It's been this way for years I've kept hope it will get better. We've lost two babies a few years ago so we've been through a lot together, however I can't stand the loneliness and pain and crying myself to sleep at night. He is a great dad & my daughter adores him. I can't live like this! It's not fair & I dont deserve this especially all we have gone through. He is rude & arrogant & uses every oppty to put me down today he told me that I looked pasty & needed some sun after three weeks of being on bed rest due to an injury! He knows he is wrong when I say are you for real? And just smurks. He tries to hurt mr when he thinks he is being treated bad my me, he recently hurt HUD back so my injury came too close to his so he thinks its all about me now. He is so emotionally immature & focuses on this petty stuff instead of the real issues with our marriage.

I'm sorry you're feeling this way. You're not alone. I'm going through the same thing. I don't know what to do either.

I am sorry for the way you have been feeling and can assure you that you are certainly

not alone. I could have been the one who wrote the majority of what you shared here.



They say actions speak louder than words, and I know first hand how much some actions (or non actions) can hurt.



I wish I could give you an 'answer' but I am still looking for answers myself. At least you can take a small bit of comfort in knowing that you are not in fact alone.

SO sorry you are going through this. Many women go through the same thing you are speaking about. There are men out here that do care and love to give attention. Open your eyes and confront him about this and if he doesn't change do something about it so you don't live life miserable. xoxoxo

My first thought is another woman. Is it possible he is cheating on you?



Whatever the case may be, I would turn the tables on him. First off, stop approaching him for sex if he is just turning away. Wipe your tears and slap a happy face on. Nothing drives a man crazier than a happy woman. It will bug the heck out of him as to why you're so happy when you should be feeling miserable from the way he is treating you. Pamper yourself, stop trying to please him and start pleasing yourself. He will start paying attention then because he'll want to know what(or who) brought about your change. Don't let him buffalo you into thinking he doesn't care. If he didn't care, he wouldn't be putting on the perfect hubby act when others are around.



From the little bit you described, I'm still thinking another woman is the problem. But don't go accusing him, that's just a quess on my part.



Keep us posted.