He's Emotionally Checked Out

My husband has made rules. One of them is that I can't ever talk about something I may want in front of or to him. So I'm constantly on guard lest I slip and mention an ad I saw for a washing machine. How is it normal for me to never mention wants and material desires to my husband?

Another rule is I can never mention something he has said back to him. Such as him telling me that I don't work since I am a stay at home mom.

Earlier tonight for the hundredth time I asked him to come to the kitchen while I cleaned after supper, maybe help. He flat out said no, played on his phone, and then went to play a card game with the kids. We haven't said more than a dozen words to each other in the past couple days. What makes it worse is, when we are visiting his mom, after the meal he jumps up from the table and starts cleaning without being asked. What the heck?!?!

Next week our kids are out for a week for fall break. He's planned a camping trip with them and is taking our oldest to a concert. I can't camp (recovering from 2 ruptured discs), and me going to the concert was mentioned and I was looked at with an expression of horror.

I just want conversation. Someone interested in who I am and what I think. To feel important and cherished, a priority.

To be told I'm beautiful, and that I matter more than anything.I don't know how much longer I can go on.
contraalto contraalto
31-35, F
1 Response Oct 1, 2012

you should not always look for whether he is doing house work or not. Stop nagging around, it just make it worse. However you said you only want conversation, then you guys should go to counselor or something. You should talk about what you want with you husband, share your emotions, concern with him. If he is not available then look for someone else!