I Am So Sad That Alcohol Is Ruining Our LivesIts been really interesting reading the stories here. Until now I had not understood that the unreasonable rages that alcoholics go in to are so common. I don't know how I missed this, but the first time my husband's drinking got out of control I was so emotionally destroyed that I just couldn't face reading up about it on the internet.
This time I am stronger and I have told my husband to go to rehab or I am leaving. I hope that he will choose me over the booze, but even if he does I am not sure I will stay. There are many other problems in our marriage and the booze is just at the top of the pile for now.
The main reason I doubt the ability to stay is that I do not think I will ever be able to trust him again to not hurt me. He has never hurt me physically, but the emotional beatings I have taken have left their mark. The terrible, vicious and hurtful things he has said to me when in a vodka-induced rage are still sitting in my head and I have not been able to erase them. Of course he cannot even remember saying these things so if I bring them up with our marriage councellor he just says I am being ridiculous and that he would never think or say that! But just because he can't remember does not mean that I am able to forgive or forget. All those things he said HURT!!!
I am also reading up on co-dependancy as I suspect that has a large part to play in all of this and if so then I have to take responsibility for than and change my own behaviour!
In the meantime I am waiting to hear back from him, will he go get help, or will he come up with an excuse?
NeedingToVent 36-40, F 3 Responses 1 Sep 17, 2012