July 15 2010...a Day In My Memory That Will Forever Haunt Me..

okay..my husband left me...really left me..took what he could take and got on a plane and went to wherever it was he went to. I am heartbroken and shattered..I thought we were going to try...and make it work..thought we were on a positive swing..boy was I wrong. He left me a three page letter on how ...he hates where we live NY its all my fault..blah blah blah left a job to be with me...(8.5yrsago) (you would think he would have said something a little sooner...that this time frame)that ever since he got laid off from work(2 yrs ago..of which I supported him and still did up til today) he needs his Friends more than me..and he isnt happy because I asked him to spend time with me..to put the Cell phone /computer down and have some sort of undivided attn with me....his wife...well I guess me asking him to give up those precious hours with his friends (21 year old girl) made him leave me. So here I sit in my bedroom..reminders of him here...its very heartbreaking and sad...but I have some positives... and I am going to hang to them like a life preserver..:

1. I have my family..Mom, Dad, Sister, Brother in Law, niece and nephew...they love me unconditionally...and are here for me anytime anyplace.

2. I have my friends ...on EP and at work...they are there for me in my hour of need and I appreciate it. They are there for me unconditionally..as I would for them.

3. I have a Job. He doesnt..so how he is going to support himself is beyond me..but whatever I work I earn..I keep..all mine...

4. I have health insurance...as of Monday he isnt...(my job..my policy) so i guess I am going to be saving money with that...

5. I have my gym membership..as of Monday he isnt...(I pay for that) ..so I guess I am going to be saving money with that..

6. I have my cats. If I am lonely I will cuddle with them..

7. I have my checking account..since I closed the shared account and put the funds into mine. I earned it..its mine. Not his.

8. i have the car. He left it at the airport...so I got it. (its paid for) so just need to get over my fear....hehe of driving it.

I guess this is something to start on...So I am sad and heartbroken..and shattered..I will survive..and words of wisdom from a friend today stated.." everything happens for a reason...you will become stronger and better ..i know it may not seem like it now...chin up"

So as much as I want to FML....I am not going to...I am going to Chin up..and walk forward..and hopefully in time without a whole mess of tears.. Peace.
Tzodiana Tzodiana
31-35, F
5 Responses Jul 15, 2010

Sounds like he is a jerk and a coward. A jerk for not trying to talk things out with you and trying to find a middle ground. A coward for leaving a note. A real man or woman will talk face to face with someone and tell them . I think you are better off without him. He sounds immature . Who wants to be with someone that is immature? Now that he is gone I hope you find a real man to be your life partner. I don't mean a muscle bound macho type. I am talking about someone who will talk to you if there is a problem and not yell and scream like an idiot. Calmly talk about things and admit when they are wrong. Someone who will treat you with respect and be kind and loyal to you. I get fired up when I hear stuff like this because I have an 24 year old daughter that has an controlling obnoxious jerk for a husband.

Im so sorry that this happend to you, but you will become stronger and happier over time. U deserve better and u will find it when the time is rite. Stay strong i know it dosnt feel like it but everything will work out for the better.

It sounds like you are a whole lot better off without him. Remember, this too shall pass......

Karma ..what goes around comes around...someday he will realize what he lost...and fortunately I will be in a Very Much more happier life situation. I plan on it..just right now its hard....thank you for your words....Julietlovesu415 and Ellipticalman :)

Sounds like you dont need him and you're better off without him. I think its great that you basically pulled the rug out from under hes feet and it will help you get back on yours. He is such a coward and it will get back to him, hopefully Karma hits him hard.