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I Need a Friend to Talk to Openly

Trust Issues

By: Aspirerl3
Written on January 15th, 2011
I don't understand this peculiar internal barrier that keeps me from telling even my closest friend about what's bothering me, especially at home... I don't trust anyone to the extent where I am positive that he/she wouldn't go blabbering about it, or to be more accurate, I don't allow myself to get to that point. People love to gossip, and many take pleasure in other people's mistakes and sufferings, just to satsify their conscience by proving to themselves that they are not the only ones to commit mistakes. I don't think I have found the person who would listen intently to what's bothering me, and who would provide me sincere comfort, but yet again, I may have found this person but a part of me remains skeptical and in constant doubt. To judge if that person I have in mind is worthy of my trust and worthy to be acknowledged with my deep secrets, I need time. What I know is that I can no longer keep these things confined between the walls of my heart because they are slowly beginning to scrape it with their growing intensity... I hope I come across a friendly stranger here who would sincerely read through what is bothering me.
I am here, running away from the world of false pretenses in which I live in, away from people with double faces and cruel intentions, looking forward to share my thoughts and feelings without being judged and simultaneously offer my time to those who need and ask for it without judging  them.
This is my first story and, hopefully, the introduction to many more to come :)
By: Aspirerl3
Age: 18-21 , Female
422 people have read this story

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7 responses
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    emzwilleatyourbrain
    emzwilleatyourbrain

    i'm a good friend

    i get picked on a lot cause i'm really shy

    but the few friends i have say they never want to lose me

    but i'll never know if they're lying, or if they talk behind my back.

    i wish i could though, cause then i wouldn't be friends with them

    i wouldn't feel secure knowing they are a different person than what they say they are.

    i also like to rhyme, and i don't like to waste people's time.

    heh, some say i'm not normal either

    but what is normal? i'll never know and i don't give a ****.

    WOOOO am i wasting my time, writing to a stranger on the interwebs?

    i think i may be, but i'll give it a try anyway



    but it'd be cool if i werent

    Apr 19, 2011
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    rchiolino
    rchiolino

    I have one friend who came into my life 25 yrs ago when we were only 24 and single parents. I can tell her anything, she never judges or condems, she never gossips and i trust her with my life and with the lives of my children. God truly blessed me the day he brought us together, I try to let her know often how much her friendship means to me. I pray that you will find such a friend, but you have to trust to find it. It can be difficult, search your heart, even if you don't find that friend, nothing, no ones words no ones actions can hurt you unless you allow them to. We are all truly alike, what you fell others feel to. If you open the door for someone they may be the answer to your prayer, they may not be. you have nothing to lose and everything to gain by trusting someone.

    Feb 3, 2011
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    bluedude1
    bluedude1

    You are searching for truth.. Good start. Look into your spirit for answers. Do not stray.. Easy to say, sometimes tough to do.. You have plenty of time.. Peace!!!! I will always listen....

    Feb 2, 2011
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    bluedude1
    bluedude1

    Cool. I am there.. I am here so I am a "horndog", but with soul.. Nudity, nude beaches is just that.. flashing is a different thing, but I guess sometimes that is fun!!!! Just because... It is all good if you keep it that way.

    Jan 15, 2011
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    Aspirerl3
    Aspirerl3

    Actually I do have a small notebook in which I sometimes write random thoughts in, and on other occasions some deeply confused ones, and it did help; I would feel somehow a bit more relieved, as if some of the pressure is gone. Nevertheless, it's not similar to talking to someone about it or just pouring it all out out loud you know what I mean? Hahah and yea sure I wouldn't mind for a couple of days, it would be a nice experience ;D.

    Thank you for giving me your time :)

    Jan 15, 2011
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      egatsoh
      egatsoh

      I tried writing you about this and it didn't work, I new, have to learn how to do. send me your email, mine is st.borg60@gmail.com

      Sep 11, 2011
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      egatsoh
      egatsoh

      After I sent you the last I thought that i Sounded like a lot of others just trying to get you email and have cyber encounters. That's not it at all. Don't get me wrong, I'm as horny as Blue Dude....maybe more. Sometimes I wish it would just fall off and leave me alone. But it won't and we have learned how to co-exist. Thought I would send this for what it's worth to you. I have felt some of your pain and I wanna hepl. That is my therapy for youand me.

      Sep 11, 2011
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