Got No Friends, Why Nobody Care About Me?

I'm the youngest of three women, my elder sisters are 6 and 5 years older than me, since I remember they never wanted to play with me. When I was old enough to go to school, my mother decided to have a job. So, when I was only 6 years old I had to walk by myself home. Kind of scary but I had to get used to it. Unfortunately at that age I already knew how to write and read, so my school teacher tought it was better for me to skip 1st grade. There I was with older kids than me, I remember that I didn't even know what "tests" meant. As you can imagine, no friends. Who wanted to hang out with me???? I believe that's when my first depression started. By fourth grade I was used to be the "class youngest" but my chubby body made me blend with the older girls, by 5th grade, who I consider my best friend Laura got another friend, Barbara and they began to call me "pig", I wasn't fat, but I wasn't skinny either, kids are cruel. Also, I wasn't the smartest, just a regular kid, why? Even when I was the youngest, my parents were so busy working that they didn't have time to do homework with me, and my sisters really didn't care. Every afternoon was meant to watch tv, until my parents decide we were watching a lot of tv so they limited it to only nights. So no friends to play with, sisters to older to be with me and no parents on sight. I still have a lot to say, right now I'm really depressed and I want to understand why I'm so underestimated, my husband is sleeping beside me but he doesn't care I'm depressed!!! My medication is running out and I have begin to wonder if somebody will miss me if I'm not here. of course my kids will miss me, but for how long. I really envy the girls who call each other and tell each other everything but every time I try to bond with someone they stop calling or reject every attempt I made. :'(
SoNeedy SoNeedy
31-35
2 Responses Jan 15, 2013

hi

hope things are better now. Smile

Somtimes I feel the same way ,my problem is the city I hate it people are so fake now days ,and don't care about each other, that's why I spend most of my time outside the states in the real world ..