Written on February 29th, 2012
My Mom left me when I was 5-6 years old and ever since my heart has been so sad and hurt. I am the biggest fan of love and affection and sometimes I wonder if this is why not having a mom in my life hurts me so much. I feel so alone. I can only imagine how it would feel to have a Mom hold you, embrace you and protect you everytime you fall down in life which happens often. I always have to hurt and cry bymyself.. I always have to figure it out painfully alone. I want a mother, I need a mother I am one of the few that really do need one. I need her to hold me when I am sad, to love me when I feel alone and to teach me and remind me when I forget. Mother and child is a ying to the yang. I have no Yang and my life is a mess! Not having that motherly love and support kills me slowly and I try to lie to myself all the time and say is ok.. I can survive it... but life will never be the same and will be extra hard without a mothers back up. I often wonder if there is someone out there that could be the right mom for me. I rather not do this alone. I don't care if is not my real mom as long as it feels right. I know it is possible to build a mother and doughter relationship with the right person, chemistry and energy. I hope I find her because I really need her and by finding me she will have the sweetest most loving and respectful daughter with a beautiful imagination, a great poet, a hopeless romantic, a movie buff, spiritual, open minded and just a good person. I hope all those who have a kind, loving caring mom know she is worth GOLD! :-( and for those who do not hang in there I am trying to change that for all of us. We deserve it!