I Want A Family Now.

I've always been attracted to men of another race. I don't think it has anything to do with them being white, I think it's just who I've been around my entire life. I assume that the man I married will be white as well. One thing I hate is men that are interested in me BECAUSE I'm a black woman. Their attraction has nothing to do with who I am as a person, only the color of my skin. They have some fantasy about being with a black woman. That's not what I'm interested in. I want a man to love me for the woman that I am. I want a man to adore me and respect the fact that I'm black.... but not let it be the reason he was attracted to me. I want a family now and I feel like I'll never find that love. Every time I think I've found it, I realize the man is just playing games. I want a husband and to be a wife. I feel like I was made to be a loving wife and mother. I want a husband and baby so badly it hurts sometime. Where has all the real love gone?