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Dilemma

I'm in a bit of a situation. There's this guy, Mark, in college, whom I don't like in that way, but I can see myself liking him. He's cute, nice, smart, funny, and Jewish like me. However, I've never had luck with guys, so I'm trying with all my might not to like him because I just know it won't work out. He seems to have great chemistry with my friend, Claire, even though she told me that she's not sure whether she likes him or not. They went to the movies together and Claire has no idea whether or not it was a date. She also told me that she wants to figure out her feelings towards him, so dating might be a possibility.

Here are my options:
1) Avoid Mark like the plague. Then him and Claire will either get together or they won't. If they will, then I'll feel super-jealous, even if I won't like him and I'll be mad at myself for not trying to win him over before. And if they won't, then I can either make a move or things will stay the same as they are now.

2) Flirt with Mark and try to become better friends with him. Then either: a) I'll like him and it'll be mutual (yeah right!), b) I won't like him, or c) I'll like him and it'll turn out that he likes Claire.

What to do?
nelsongirl nelsongirl 19-21, F 2 Responses Jan 26, 2008

Your Response

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WOW.....well, first of all. Do you like the guy or not? "Seem's like your a bit confused about your feelings for this guy." Either you like him, or you don't. Don't play any games with this situation okay. If you like this guy, then....go ahead, make your move! But, if you don't, then, don't do anything. Maybe you only want to be pals with him. So, if you think that your friend likes him and your not sure that you do, don't go for it! Leave your friend go for it. Because you'll be playing this ridiculous and childish game that neither of you will accomplish anything by doing so. Think about it. Is he worth it? :

I would say if you don't like him, and your friend does, she might get upset if you try to flirt with him. But, if you already like him, which I suspect you do, you might have an issue to deal with, as it seems that he might like Claire since they went to the movies together. Perhaps, then, you should let Claire know how you feel.<br />
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The important thing is- don't skip out on opportunities like this because you are afraid. Its what I did and I regret always feeling too self conscious to speak to men. Now i'm 22 and have only ever had one boyfriend. I would have rathered embarassing myself a time or two by trying to get to know a guy and being rejected, than have hidden away as I did, too shy to make any moves.