Interracial Love

Haha, go to Brazil...or Europe, or Africa (aside from South Africa where there's still much racial tension) there's way more mixing there! Cape Verde is pretty much a mix of everything, so are the french Islands. In the oh so multicultural America ironically there isn't much! I think it's the jim crow laws though. I've been approached by so many white men, who were NOT from America! That jim crow law was pretty deep into the American culture.

I respect your feelings but do keep in mind that of all the black men in the world you've probably dated a small segment. For example, african men and african american men have a very different culture. Or black latinos (Ironically, there are more black men in south america than the US but they get ignored). Then there are black men from the french Islands (Martinique for example) who are closer to a European mindset.

Also, you were 19 : / and experimenting with men. There's nothing wrong with that but I know plenty of white black couples in my country of origin who are very happy. I have mixed cousins and most are fine but I do know people who got divorced within a year because of cultural differences.
Of course, not all interracial marriages are a walk in the park and some children get confused or rejected by both sides so it does have its downsides.

Excuse me but I couldn't help noticing that you are way off when replying to this girls post. I re-read it several times because of your comment and she NEVER referred to her love interest as, "acting black." Nor did she even use the word, "ghetto." Obviously her family has a problem with her dating outside her race but at no time did she exhibit racism. I hope that once her family sees how happy her boyfriend is making her, they will become more open-minded and accept the relationship.

She does on a response down below use Ghetto and acting black

I know... but I wish that he would realize that I'm happy and try not to ruin it??

Thank you!!!!!!!!!

Nope, when you are a minor and the parents pay the bills, he has all the say in all the matters, Calypso. That's the way it is.

He may have a say as a parent, but when someone is clearly in the wrong, Racism definitely being wrong, they need to be shown what is right. Whether it be by their children, friends or whoever. Anyone has the right to stand up for what they believe in. In a respectful way of course.

Nope, the parents make the rules. It's not a question.

Well your kids are going to find it very difficult to talk open and honestly with you if that is the way you run things. It wont stop them from doing what they want and believe, it just means that they will do it behind your back and rebel. Id much rather my kids tell me when they thing something is wrong and be able to talk to me than to do it behind my back. As I said so long as it is done in a respectful way

He's kinda in the middle, not a gangster or a hoodrat, but yeah he's ghetto at times. He's really smart and I enjoy being around him. He's my second boyfriend. His parents accept me as white but my dad won't accept him, well at least he hasn't said he will.

You have been dating him for two weeks and he occasionally does the ghetto thing? Yeah, you are a single mother in waiting, or facing a potential drug-related arrest in your future. Better grow out of the bad-boy-gansta type phase quickly. I am not saying switch to only white guys, but switch to employable men (of any race). Sorry for the straight talk from a stranger. Just something to consider, no offense.

He's not like that though... He's really loyal. I mean he acts black, he doesn't act like a prep or anything but he's good in the heart.

I like your honesty. When we start a relationship, even if you are as old as a friend of mine who is in her 50's, we tend to see the relationship through rose-colored glasses. Please keep in touch and write again next month and once again after you have been dating for three months. Look for how he treats you in public and private, how much money he spends on you, and his future education plans. Run away fast if he is a wannabe rapper, producer, drug dealer, hustler, etc. You deserve to be treated like the princess your father sees you. Nothing less is worth your time.

Thanks!!

but I don't wanna

Then deal with the consequences.

Yeah, I know that since I live under his roof I have to do as told but if I'm depressed all the time won't that make him rethink it? Maybe?

Sure, but fathers are stupid. Talk it out with him . Hemightlisten if you're mature about it :)

I know, I tried to be mature by telling him but he won't even speak to me...

Let him cool down a bit and be as good as you can to your dad, then talk it over once he's simmered down

idk

Do whatever you want, girlie. I've said my piece! :)

No sweetheart. Your father is treating you like a child because you are still a child. It's hard to grasp when you are young because you think to yourself,"I'm not a little kid. I've experienced so much etc." BUT.... Remember way way way back to the 5th grade? Do you remember your friends, your favorite things, what the most important things in your life were? Really take a minute and walk down memory lane here. Ok now I want you to remember the 6th grade (middle school). Can you remember how much you changed from the 5th grade to the 6th? Now what about the 6th to the 7th? Now think about how much you changed every year. Remember that no matter how much you think you know or feel (holy crap really listen to this part about the feel) you aren't done yet my dear. You aren't done growing and maturing. Don't try to force it either. It comes with time and life experience. It can't be imitated or rushed, it happens the way life happens which is to say unexpectedly. Especially remember the part I said about when you KNOW you feel something. Remember when you "knew" you were going to grow up and be a princess? It's the same with boys ok? I promise you! Don't get too serious. Because what was so cool in the 6th grade was super freakin' lame in the 7th grade. That won't change for many years. I'm a 24 year old woman and I had a lot of adult experiences as a teenager. Yes when I say adult I mean everything bad. Alcohol, marajuana, sex, multiple expulsions from school, depression, driving my parents absolutely insane. I did a lot of things and I always thought I "knew what I was doing" for much of it. I didn't have a clue as in what I was truly doing to myself. Think this over, you are young and you are going to have boyfriends. But please be careful with how serious these relationships get. Don't try to spend every waking moment with your boyfriend, he's not the most important thing in the world. It's ok for him to make the top ten list but that's it ok? :) no matter what we say you still have to make that choice but we are all just trying to help you make the best choice. Even if what I said about boys doesn't sound like you please don't disregard it. In the next few months or year it might sound like you or perhaps a close friend who you are concerned about. Good luck sweetheart. Have fun but also Make sure that you are first and foremost making good choices!

Bravo!

He tells my step mom what he thinks, but won't speak to me.. Seems immature to me.

He won't eat dinner as a family anymore. And I honestly don't care what people think. He's the only opinion I wanted on this and he won't even speak to me.

I think his silence is all the opinion you need, he obviously is opposed to the relationship.

Bleh

I'm sorry that the boy you like is causing friction in your family. I know this is difficult for you and it is making you angry. Just because somebody is an adult doesn't mean they are going to make the best decisions. The funny thing is that if a person overreacts its really easy to brush off what they're saying. Even if what they are saying is right... When you overreact nobody wants to listen. But when he does finally talk, try to let go of that anger and really listen to what he says ok? It might be something you didn't expect or something you don't understand yet. Try and be patient. Even if he's wrong he is still your dad.